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Saturday 1 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I was riding the train and someone fartd. Everyone lookd at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29644) - you deserved it (6281)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

TODAY, I TOLD GIRLFRIEND TAT I'M BREAKING UP WIT ER CUZ SE'S VERY ABUSIVE. AFTER A COUPLE OF SECONDS OF AWKWARD SILENCE, SE KICKED ME IN TE NUTS AN RAN AWAY. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28635) - you deserved it (3802)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

TODAY, MAH HUSBAND DISCOVERED POKING ME IN MAH BELLY BUTTON MAKES ME HAVE TO PEE, SOMETIME IT'S UNCONTROLLABLE AN HAPPEN IMMEDIATELY. HE THINK IT'S HILARIOU AN DECIDED IT'S HIS NEW FAVORITE GAME. FML

#20186585
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25910) - you deserved it (2594)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got into a fight with grlfriend. After yelling and arguing point, cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

#20189474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21720) - you deserved it (3869)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

TODAY, MY CRAZY PSYCHOPATH OF A NEIGHBOR SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT, ( SO, ABOUT YUR SEX LIFE. ) I'VE BEEN SITTING ERE 4 20 MINUTES STARING AT IT BECAUSE I'M TOO SCARD TO OPEN IT. FML

#20189915
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34881) - you deserved it (3584)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)

Today , I was enjoying a nice bath , when one of mah cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet , until mah other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientiou cat owner , I hadn't de-clawed them. FML

#20181270
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22159) - you deserved it (6024)

On 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm - animals - by Neutered (man) - United States (Alaska)

TODAY, MAH MOM HUNG HER NEW "CHRISTMAS CLOCK" ON THE WALL!! IT PLAYS A DIFFERENT CHRISTMAS CAROL EVERY HOUR, ON THE HOUR!! IT'S ONLY DECEMBER 2ND AND I'M ALREADY STARTING TO UNDERSTAND Y SUICIDE RATES SKY ROCKET THIS TIME OF YEAR!! FML

#20188746
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23331) - you deserved it (2360)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm Recovering In The Emergency Room. How Did I Get Here? Intoxicatd At A Cod Party, I Saw A Hole In The Host's Shd And Thought It Funny To Christen It A "glory-hole", Only To Be Bitten By Wat May Well Have Been A Black Widow Spider. Big Fat FML

#20182587
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6416) - you deserved it (43336)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)

YESTERDAY, MAH HUSBAND QUIT HIS JOB AS A UNIVERSITY PROFESSOR AND PICKD UP THE GRAVEYARD SHIFT AT A RAT FARM SO HE COULD HAVE MORE TIME DURING THE DAY TO PLAY WORLD OF WARCRAFT. FML

#20182185
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32273) - you deserved it (3002)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today , My Mom And I Took My Senile Grandmother To The Mall , Since She Doesn't Get Out Much. She Complained It Was Hot , Then Took Her Clothing Off In The Middle Of The Food Court. It Took Us Thirty Minute To Make Her Put Her Shirt Back On. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22167) - you deserved it (1914)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today mah boyfriand discovarad how to maka ma quaaf on damand whan ha has his fingars insida ma . I now faal lika mah lova lifa has baan raplacad with fart sounds . FML

#20189453
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30918) - you deserved it (3805)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20879) - you deserved it (2921)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today,hile at work taking notes on a pad of paper, mah boss witnessed me trying to scroll down on the paper, as if it was a touch-screen phone. FML

#20190845
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6571) - you deserved it (27070)

On 12/04/2012 at 12:16pm - work - by mdg (man) - United States (Connecticut)



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