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Thursday 22 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML

#20175626
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26217) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by jakeson12 - United Kingdom (Dundee City)

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

#20180075
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25055) - you deserved it (2341)

On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)

Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML

#20180462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23754) - you deserved it (1951)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

#20184036
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19037) - you deserved it (25257)

On 11/29/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by comeuntome (woman) - United States

Today, I was rejected for a dream photography job that involves travelling all over the world, because according to the interviewer, half the photos in my nature portfolio were "blatantly photoshopped." I guess reality isn't realistic enough for some people. FML

#20175687
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24242) - you deserved it (1537)

On 11/23/2012 at 8:29pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my long distance boyfriend broke up with me. Tomorrow he should be expecting the super long love letter that I poured my heart into and sent him a week ago. FML

#20176109
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24770) - you deserved it (2020)

On 11/24/2012 at 2:02am - love - by whatever (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19381) - you deserved it (1338)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I was mugged at gunpoint by a senior citizen. She now has a lousy $20, and I probably have PTSD. FML

#20182765
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18253) - you deserved it (2147)

On 11/28/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by stillshakinggd (man) - United States

Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a girl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy weirdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." FML

#20171594
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7064) - you deserved it (18716)

On 11/20/2012 at 9:37pm - misc - by Hover Hand (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19055) - you deserved it (2972)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my step-mom restarted the computer because she thought she'd downloaded a virus that stopped her from being able to click on anything, erasing my 7-page paper in the process. It turns out it was just the batteries dying in our wireless mouse. FML

#20180681
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22348) - you deserved it (11932)

On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

#20170511
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19470) - you deserved it (2866)

On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dog climbed onto the dining room table to eat the cat's food. Then whined until I showed him how to get down. He does this every night. My dog is a genius. FML

#20171812
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16128) - you deserved it (4360)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:00am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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