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Today...ile working ma sift at Taco Bell... a creepy guy startd flirting wit me. He said... "You remind me of someting..." acting as if I knew im from elsewere. I quickly said I usd to work at Cili's. He sook is ead and said... "No... not a person! An animal. A slot maybe." FML
Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing mah feelings to a grl I looool really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML
2day my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her . My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept . She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed .
Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a ( no-good fucking whore ), because I couldn't fix his laptop. The same laptop he threw on the floor after screaming ( FUCKING HEAL MEEE! ) at his game. As ever, my parents took his side, refusing to believe that I can't fix a cracked monitor. FML
TODAY, I WENT OUT TO APPLEBEES WITH A GRL I LYK AND A GROUP OF FRIENDS. SOMEONE ASKD IF THE GRL AND I WERE DATING. SHE INSTANTLY REPLID WITH A BIT OF DISGUST "WHAT? NO WAY, NEVER!" IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE TO KNOW BEFORE PAYING FOR THE LAST TEN OR SO DATES WE WENT ON.
Today , my friend asked to borrow my new laptop to email his college professor. When he returned it , it had a virus on it , and I had to fish out two pubic hairs that were sticking out between the keys. FML
Today , mah boss threatened to fire me because of a tattoo I have!! It's a small teddy bear on mah leg with mah parents' names on it!! My workplace has no problems with tattoos , but mah boss said it was "unoriginal an lame." It's a memorial tattoo; mah parents died last year!! FML
Today, I spent three hours painstakingly installing and configuring some parental control software on my 11-year-old son's laptop after I caught him watching porn!! Barely an hour after returning the laptop, I caught him watching yet more porn on it!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015