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February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a guy wolf-whistled me as I walked to the shop wearing comfy joggers, no makeup and my hair scraped back. Feeling rather pleased about it, I told my best friend and my fiancé. Their unanimous conclusion: the guy must have been drunk or taking hallucinogenic drugs. FML

Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML

#20515174
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32287) - you deserved it (4631)

On 02/20/2013 at 5:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, the office coffee machine was relocated next to my desk. My co-worker insists on making several cups of the stuff per day, but instead of drinking it, he stands next to me, audibly swishes it through his teeth, gargles, and drools it back into the cup. I retch every single time. FML

#20499511
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26546) - you deserved it (1867)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:21pm - misc - by UuuuUUUUhhgghghghGHh (woman) - Kenya

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26527) - you deserved it (2842)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, for the second time in two months, the person in the bathroom stall next to me commented on how loud I pee. This time, she made racehorse noises. I'm now too self-conscious to pee in public again. FML

#20503939
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25892) - you deserved it (2683)

On 02/12/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by likearacehorse (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

#20506625
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28248) - you deserved it (3334)

On 02/14/2013 at 3:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany

Today, I found out that my mom has linked my iPhone with her iPad and has been secretly reading my texts. FML

#20524792
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35187) - you deserved it (3737)

On 02/27/2013 at 7:27pm - misc - by segal1010 - United States (Maryland)

Today, after nearly six weeks of seeing a nice girl, we finally decided to make it official. Two hours later, she pulled out a bridal magazine and not-so-casually asked me which wedding location I thought was the nicest. FML

#20517490
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30075) - you deserved it (3775)

On 02/22/2013 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I came home from a rough day working two jobs to find a plate of cookies on my desk with a note from my roommates saying, "You deserve it!" I happily broke one in half to eat and discovered they contained coconut. I'm allergic to coconut, a fact both of my roommates are aware of. FML

#20521168
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31004) - you deserved it (3260)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he was thinking about us taking a break. After an hour of crying and him saying it would be okay, I accepted it. When I asked when the break would start, he replied, "What are you talking about? I only said I'd thought about it" and then laughed. FML

#20521204
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36490) - you deserved it (6675)

On 02/25/2013 at 1:10am - love - by Gullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML

#20525412
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31689) - you deserved it (2240)

On 02/28/2013 at 6:02am - misc - by catdog552 - United States

Today, I checked out a "confessions" page for my university. The first confession was from a guy who whacked off in a campus restroom then used a computer in a lab without washing his hands. I work in that lab. FML

#20501884
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35049) - you deserved it (2949)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to college on bike through snow and hail only to find out my professor can't make it to class due to the weather. She lives down my street. FML

#20495386
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29176) - you deserved it (2865)

On 02/06/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by refticon (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)



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