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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

today I had the best sex of looool our relationship with mah boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, lookd me sweetly in the eyes 4 a few moments, then decidd to slap me in the face with it. real FML

#20168405
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38271) - you deserved it (5682)

On 11/18/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by besviken (woman) - Sweden (Uppsala Lan)

Today , I was watching a video from the 80s on sexual dysfunctions , and I noticd that one of the boys in the film looool lookd strangely like mah dadhen he was younger!! After a little investigation , I now know that in his youth , mah dad had a crippling masturbation problem!! FML

#20181345
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42247) - you deserved it (3719)

On 11/27/2012 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today..!! While At A Red Light..!! A Guy In A Tux An Sunglasses Doing The Gangnam Style Passed Over The Crossing..!! Followed By A Man With A Video Camera!! This Isn't The First Time I've Stopped For People Doing A Gangnam Style Parody!! FML

#20165330
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23708) - you deserved it (3611)

On 11/16/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by Gangnam (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, mah boyfriend broke up with me . I came back home in tears, an eventually told mah dad wat was wrong . He immediately excused himself to the living room,here I heard him tell mah mum, "She's gone all Taylor Swift again." FML

#20159285
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22645) - you deserved it (10366)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:48pm - love - by notalovestory (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today , I ran into mah sister,ho nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML

#20179890
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31078) - you deserved it (3544)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

today I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout mah childhood is actually the sound mah mom makes when she comes!! FML

#20160628
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39021) - you deserved it (2720)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend cummd and sat on my lap. She landd directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. mega FML

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to fine that while I was passd out someone stole mah prosthetic leg. FML

#20160279
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33300) - you deserved it (6048)

On 11/12/2012 at 10:10am - health - by poserpilot - United States (California)

TODAY, I TRIED TO MOTIVATE MY 9-YEAR-OLD SISTER TO CLEAN HER ROOM. SHE SAID SHE'D ONLY AGREE IF SHE COULD KILL ME. THINKING SHE WAS JUST KIDDING AROUND, AND NOT A TOTAL PSYCHOPATH, I SAID SURE. SHE RAN TO HER ROOM SHOUTING, ( YES! I'M GONNA USE THE BIG KNIFE! ) SHE'S STILL CLEANING NOW. FML

#20172481
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26026) - you deserved it (5664)

On 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm - kids - by anon - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today... my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat... he also got inside the car an sat next to my date... pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time... an walked me back to the house. My mom laughed an gave him $20. It was a dare. FML

Today , I took a picture of myself wereing a whipped cream bra with cherry nipples , captioned , "I hope u enjoyed your dinner , now how about some dessert???" I meant to send it to my fiancé. I sent it by mistake to my dad. FML

#20176010
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18504) - you deserved it (44402)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Whipped Cream - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes . FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28907) - you deserved it (3115)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far and I've already pulled five carving looool forks out of four different people. Good job everybody. FML

#20174027
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22476) - you deserved it (1529)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)



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