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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to buy a new vacuum cleaner. My previous one stopped working, because apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to suck up our puppy's shit from the floor. FML

#20155036
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (2292)

On 11/08/2012 at 2:03pm - love - by 99Problemsandfml - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized the number of cats I currently have is higher than the number of guys I've ever dated. FML

#20169381
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21109) - you deserved it (17497)

On 11/19/2012 at 11:15am - animals - by crazycatlady (woman) - United States

Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML

#20155774
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24100) - you deserved it (2759)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by holyshitbatman - United States (Ohio)

Today, at the age of 29, I now have a relationship on par with a teenager's. Several weeks ago, my fiancé and I lost our home, and are now back living with our respective families. We now have no privacy. I actually just got dropped off at home, before 10, after having sex in a hay field. FML

#20168945
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34218) - you deserved it (4686)

On 11/19/2012 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I saw my cat playing with one of his many toy mice. Knowing he likes to play fetch, I picked it up and threw it across the room. Upon trying to pick it up a second time, I realized that not only was it not a toy, but it was only half-dead. FML

#20174725
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24857) - you deserved it (3378)

On 11/23/2012 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have an ear infection. The pain from it radiates from my ear all the way down the left side of my face, so my doctor prescribed me something that makes half of my face numb and pretty much unusable. Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation on strokes for my med class. Go figure. FML

#20170659
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24857) - you deserved it (1684)

On 11/20/2012 at 5:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my English professor accused me of plagiarizing a poem I submitted, because she'd read it online earlier that day. The poem was mine; I posted it after writing it for her class, and even after logging into the site to prove it, she reported me to the school. FML

Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML

#20152272
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24796) - you deserved it (4361)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:48am - work - by jailofc (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad offered to pay me $40 to wash his car. Needing money to buy a video game, I agreed, and went out in the freezing weather to do the job. I finished the task, only to be paid in Monopoly money. My dad still hasn't gotten over how "funny" his prank was. FML

#20158140
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27451) - you deserved it (3630)

On 11/10/2012 at 10:10pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years old. FML

#20170920
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25628) - you deserved it (3066)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:23pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML

#20146253
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6553) - you deserved it (31794)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by justcomesnaturally (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I had just had a shower, when I noticed that the mix of my shower gel and deodorant smelled like Lynx Dark Temptation. I was happy, as this is my favourite men's deodorant, until I realised I was happily sniffing my own boobs because they smelled like my ex-boyfriend. FML

Today, my wife wants to name our first child Siri, after the iPhone function. FML

#20182157
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27751) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)



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