Today, my boyfriend and I made love for the first time. Before we left his house so he could walk me home, I fixed my hair by the hall mirror and joked about having serious sex hair. My boyfriend quickly reminded me that his incredibly religious mother was in the next room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6519) - you deserved it (19560)
On 10/08/2012 at 1:26pm - intimacy - by blabbermouth (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)
Today, for the second day in a row, I was constantly abused, yelled at, insulted, and berated by my wife for "endangering our child's life." I took her to the doctor for a vaccination and flu shot yesterday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17182) - you deserved it (2335)
On 10/17/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by DrugsRX (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17315) - you deserved it (1179)
On 10/26/2012 at 12:38am - kids - by familyofpsychos - United States (Nebraska)
Today, it was my first day in Paris. I've been saving up for five years. It was a rainy day, but I was determined to go see the Eiffel Tower. On my way, I fell down a slippery set of stairs and knocked both of my front teeth out. Now, I have the view of the Eiffel Tower from my hospital window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20797) - you deserved it (2175)
On 10/20/2012 at 3:06am - health - by parisklutz (woman) - France (Lorraine)
Today, at work my boss called me into his office because he had received multiple complaints from coworkers about a prank sound machine I have been using to make inappropriate fart sounds at my desk. I wish it was a fart machine; I have a condition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16862) - you deserved it (1331)
On 10/18/2012 at 2:33am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I left the hospital after having knee surgery. While trying to find my balance on my crutches, I was holding onto the roof of the car. My mum slammed the car door shut, not noticing my hand. I can barely even bend my fingers to hold onto my crutches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17253) - you deserved it (893)
On 10/07/2012 at 1:43am - health - by badluckbrianna (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend and I were going through some troubles in our relationship, and she said to me, "No offense, but I really hope no other relationship I have in the future will be like this one." Some offense taken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15421) - you deserved it (1732)
On 10/31/2012 at 12:22am - love - by anon (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I realized that at age 54, I'm no longer young enough to go commando anymore. Every time I sneezed today, I peed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11794) - you deserved it (7866)
On 10/05/2012 at 4:14am - health - by Darla (woman) - United States (California)
Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15976) - you deserved it (1320)
On 10/09/2012 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got a job babysitting two really sweet kids. When their parents left, they told me that their cat had died. I told them how sorry I was, to which one of them replied, "That's okay. We still have him in a box. Wanna see?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14049) - you deserved it (1119)
On 10/18/2012 at 9:57pm - kids - by Jessica - United States
Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14317) - you deserved it (885)
On 10/01/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Today, while working, a woman complained that she didn't ask for sauce on her sandwich. After examining the sandwich, I realized it was just melted cheese. When I told her, she threw the sandwich at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16430) - you deserved it (895)
On 10/02/2012 at 11:33pm - work - by Sara (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, two girls came up to me on the street and asked if they could take a photo with me for their high school scavenger hunt, because they needed a picture with a stranger. One of the girls shook her head and said to the other, "It needs to be an attractive stranger" and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14991) - you deserved it (836)
On 10/15/2012 at 6:09pm - misc - by notattractiveatall (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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