Monday 16 April 2012 
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Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38226) - you deserved it (3720)
On 04/16/2012 at 4:12am - intimacy - by oface13 (man) - United States
Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20191) - you deserved it (2556)
On 04/16/2012 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I was in the car with my daughter, when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3742) - you deserved it (18257)
On 04/16/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by DJ Clitter (man) - United States
Today, my dad came to pick me up. It would have been nicer if he'd had his clothes on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16481) - you deserved it (1094)
On 04/16/2012 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)
Today, I found out that I can get my girlfriend to make more sex noises by massaging her back than I can by actually having sex with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16599) - you deserved it (5785)
On 04/16/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I found out that my daughter has been watching Supernatural and The X-Files so she'll fit in better at school. I'm not even angry that she's suddenly a brain-dead conformist, it's just that she now has nightmares all the time and insists on sleeping in my bed. She's a kicker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13991) - you deserved it (3679)
On 04/16/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by orangechicken (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I visited my doctor upon coming home from University. I found out that I'm severely allergic to our pet bunny, which has resulted in a rash taking over my body. She suggested that we get rid of the bunny. I told my mom. She told me to come home less often. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16723) - you deserved it (1842)
On 04/16/2012 at 11:47pm - animals - by booearns (woman) - United States
Today, I was fixing a leak in the roof. When I was climbing down the ladder, it fell, but I managed to grab the ledge of the roof. The ladder hit my wife's car, then I fell on top of the ladder. My wife came running out to ask what happened to the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15647) - you deserved it (1572)
On 04/16/2012 at 11:52am - health - by fhe - Puerto Rico
Today, my mom admitted that the only reason she took me out for lunch was because she felt guilty over going on a massive shopping spree for my sister while I was forced to stay home alone. I thanked her for the Wendy's meal anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17715) - you deserved it (1148)
On 04/16/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by Rebecca - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12581) - you deserved it (3131)
On 04/16/2012 at 2:53am - misc - by hdgyfjdzdfg (woman) - United States
Today, my fiancée informed me she'd invited her ex-husband to our wedding at her parents' request. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17214) - you deserved it (1186)
On 04/16/2012 at 8:57pm - love - by Tony (man) - United States
Today, the closest I got to a vacation was the smell of my new towels, because they remind me of a hotel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11318) - you deserved it (1366)
On 04/16/2012 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17975) - you deserved it (1756)
On 04/16/2012 at 12:24am - animals - by penny-dropping - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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