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Saturday 23 February 2013

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TODAY I MET MAH MOTHER'S DEEPLY RELIGIOU FIANCÉ FOR THE FRST TIME. HIS RESPONSE UPON SEIENG ME WAS TO LOOK ME SQUARE IN THE EYE AND SAY, ( YOU'LL NEED TO TAKE OUT THAT NOSE STUD OR I'M AFRAID YOU'LL NOT BE WELCOME IN OUR HOME. ) FML

#20513141
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36358) - you deserved it (4088)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, mah boyfriend of 2 years decided to tell an unimaginably rude joke to mah grandmahile at mah house!! She hit him over the head with a vase, and he's threatening looool to press charges!! I still don't knowhose side to take!! FML

#20518703
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32277) - you deserved it (4045)

On 02/23/2013 at 11:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriand, and aftar ahila, sha movad har hand down to my crotch. Sha falt my araction, than got up and yallad at ma, calling ma a horny pig for "assuming wa wara going to hava sax." FML

#20527203
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63750) - you deserved it (5587)

On 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by sn-511 (man) - Italy (Campania)

TODAY, MY BOYFRIEND KICKED ME OUT AN THREATENED TO GET A RESTRAINING ORDER AFTER I CALLED HIM AN ASSHOLE. I'M 16 WEEKS PREGNANT AN OVER 1,000 MILES AWAY FROM MY PARENTS' HOUSE. FML

#20519336
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38442) - you deserved it (8502)

On 02/23/2013 at 8:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, it's my frst day at a naw school. I transfarrad ara halfway through tha yaar to gat away from a grl who bullias ma. Sha's apparantly bulliad har mom into transfarring har ara as wall. FML

#20513405
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42354) - you deserved it (2903)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by SchoolSucks (woman) - United States

TODAY I WENT IN TO GET MY FIRST TATTOO. I'D PUT A LOT OF TOUGT INTO IT AND WAS REALLY EXCITED WEN TE DAY CAME. LONG STORY SORT TE CELTIC KNOT I'D GOTTEN TURNED OUT TO AVE AN ALTERNATE MEANING OF ( FEMALE SEX SLAVE. ) TE FACES MY VERY IRIS FAMILY MADE WERE BEYOND WORDS. MEGA FML

#20511821
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17288) - you deserved it (44419)

On 02/18/2013 at 3:50am - intimacy - by UnluckyInk (woman) - United States (New York)

TODAY, I WAS TAKING MAH DOG FIR A WALK AN FORGOT A BAG TO PICK UP HIS POOP, SINCE IT'S ILLEGAL TO NOT PICK IT UP IN MAH TOWN. RIGHT AS MAH DOG STARTED TO TAKE A DUMP, A COP CAR DROVE BY AN CONTINUED TO WATCH ME AS I WAS FORCED TO PICK UP THE POOP WITH MAH BARE HANDS. FML

#20527973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45966) - you deserved it (21021)

On 03/02/2013 at 10:32am - animals - by yikes - United States

Today, I took my driver's test . I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout . He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!"hen I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red . The road was almost empty . He failed me on the spot . FML

#20517994
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12153) - you deserved it (46787)

On 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today , I found out that the man I just marrid doesn't want to have children . We had this conversation multiple times with no problems before getting marrid , but now he would ( rather die ) than have children , because according to him , they would ruin his life . real FML

#20527672
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31254) - you deserved it (5152)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:05am - love - by bummer.. (woman) - United States

today I met mah new class . There are two Kevin Smiths . Niether will agree to a nickname , they have the same hair color , an there middle names both start with J . They have told me to call them Kevin 1 an Kevin 2 . They both want to be Kevin 1 . FML

#20512577
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (3072)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got stuck in traffic when a shootout started somewhere behind. I lowered myself and suddenly a bullet punctured a hole in the rear screen. When I managed to get away, I called mah wife in a panic. She didn't pick up so I sent her a text about what just happened. Her reply: "K". FML

#20522482
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56338) - you deserved it (4135)

On 02/25/2013 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by n3ov (man) - Pakistan (Islamabad)

Today,hen my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD , I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old vrgin . Even as I left she still didn't believe me . FML

#20522701
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32397) - you deserved it (3474)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:21am - health - by Brook (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, mah 20-year-old daughter staggered into mah room at two in the morning, drunker than I ever thought a person could be, screaming for me to make pancake for her . FML

#20524572
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35212) - you deserved it (7253)

On 02/27/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Ugh (woman) - United Kingdom



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