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Wednesday 6 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34561) - you deserved it (2556)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my house using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

#20495653
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24656) - you deserved it (4813)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

#20505035
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28332) - you deserved it (5695)

On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)

Today, my downstairs neighbours screamed at me for making so much noise that I woke their children up and made them cry. The noise was the sound of a loose floorboard shifting as I crept to my bathroom, and again on my way back to bed. They've sworn to get me evicted. FML

#20497288
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30232) - you deserved it (2211)

On 02/07/2013 at 5:56pm - misc - by fineillpissthebedthen (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML

#20502853
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11156) - you deserved it (35713)

On 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

#20505342
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41972) - you deserved it (4676)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

#20498382
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24455) - you deserved it (3326)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML

#20504733
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31271) - you deserved it (2624)

On 02/13/2013 at 6:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (North Ayrshire)

Today, I finished my shift at the nursing home. There was too much snow on the roads, so most of us had to stay overnight. Not only did I not get to go home, I also got stuck sleeping in the same bed that a resident had died in the night before. FML

#20504938
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32313) - you deserved it (2197)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:20pm - work - by death bed (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after spending six months completely repainting and redecorating our new home, I finally finished the last touches and went to remove the masking tape. Off came the tape, along with huge blotches of plasterwork. FML

#20503623
93 comments

Today, after three and a half years of working dead-end jobs with a bachelor's degree, I got a call from a potential employer in my degree field, who wanted to set up an interview. The problem: the interview is across the country, and I'm too broke to pay the travel expenses. FML

#20498605
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30440) - you deserved it (2347)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:19pm - work - by goingnowherefast (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I finally confronted my bully. Too bad it was at my high school reunion and he beat the shit out of me. FML

#20505236
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33853) - you deserved it (5192)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at a friendly get-together, my friend's husband had too much to drink and got into a fistfight with my husband. I'm seven-and-a-half months pregnant, and the friendly get-together was my baby shower. FML

#20493991
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28889) - you deserved it (2790)

On 02/05/2013 at 12:22am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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