Thursday 17 January 2013 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25798) - you deserved it (1834)
On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was talking to my grandma and I mentioned the fact that tomatoes are technically fruit. It's been an hour and she's still yelling, accusing me of lying to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20138) - you deserved it (3199)
On 01/22/2013 at 8:35pm - misc - by I should have kept my mouth shut - United States (California)
Today, an elderly gentleman came into my store complaining of a toothache, so I showed him where the Orajel was located. He then insisted on making a big scene, claiming that I really had the magic touch and if I would just stroke his cheek all his pain would go away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22299) - you deserved it (1884)
Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25826) - you deserved it (2253)
On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)
Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21443) - you deserved it (10292)
On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland
Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21535) - you deserved it (13853)
On 01/19/2013 at 11:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, my mother insisted I dress very smartly in suit attire for my first job interview at a hippy-style retail store. My interviewer wore a poncho. I didn't get the job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22242) - you deserved it (956)
On 01/22/2013 at 2:20am - work - by frustrated - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after working the midnight shift at my job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with my boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25944) - you deserved it (4231)
On 01/15/2013 at 7:14am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25427) - you deserved it (8561)
On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I felt like going to the gym. I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to come with me. She screamed at me for supposedly implying that she's fat. No, I just wanted to go to the gym with someone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29447) - you deserved it (5081)
On 01/14/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by nkotz - United States
Today, my current boyfriend and my ex-boyfriend got into a fight about when my birthday is. They were both wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34015) - you deserved it (3651)
On 01/17/2013 at 9:06am - love - by EmberLove (woman) - United States
Today, after an hour of crying over a guy I like, I put on some Adele and sang along. My mom quickly took notice and came to give me advice, which was to "get over it" because he doesn't want me, and that "masturbation beats relationships hands down." Gee, thanks mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20500) - you deserved it (4886)
On 01/20/2013 at 1:22pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)
Today, my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven, a dryer, a dishwasher, a toilet, and a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26049) - you deserved it (2772)
On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 17 June 2013
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