Thursday 3 January 2013 
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Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19390) - you deserved it (4101)
On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21341) - you deserved it (4216)
On 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm - animals - by life// (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I woke up to a small fire on my roof, burning up small twigs and branches. The cause? Last night, I threw a sparkling firecracker up very high, only to have it blown onto my roof by the wind. It's going to take $2,000 to fix the damage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6835) - you deserved it (34395)
On 01/01/2013 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me at my grandma's funeral. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37436) - you deserved it (2160)
On 01/10/2013 at 11:06pm - love - by good job bf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7059) - you deserved it (30099)
On 01/02/2013 at 10:01am - misc - by AmberHavoc - United Kingdom
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28729) - you deserved it (5419)
On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)
Today, my roommate of a year and good friend of several more decided to move out. When I came home from a long work shift, I found all the cupboards emptied out of everything, including all the new stuff I bought to replace what she was going to take with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25793) - you deserved it (1651)
On 01/02/2013 at 12:38pm - misc - by Megz (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29263) - you deserved it (2272)
On 01/02/2013 at 1:59pm - love - by great. -
Today, I got an offer to study at a good university. My father has been pushing me to apply for years, so I ecstatically broke the news. Instead of congratulating me, he just grunted and delivered the more important news that he's divorcing my mum. Moment ruined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16629) - you deserved it (789)
On 01/05/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Sad nerd (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)
Today, I went to the hospital with stomach pains. I found out I have mono, as well as a ruptured ovarian cyst, which may need surgery. I called my best friend for support, only for her to drunkenly yell at me for not being at her party, and that this could have waited till a better time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23725) - you deserved it (4140)
On 01/10/2013 at 6:11pm - health - by thanksforthat (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boss put me on suspension, a week after granting a subordinate time off to recover from surgery. When I signed the paperwork, I was too embarrassed to admit I didn't understand her writing, which apparently said she was getting treated for "dangerously low levels of dick". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7566) - you deserved it (17063)
On 12/31/2012 at 5:42pm - work - by offtothejobcentre (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21246) - you deserved it (1950)
On 01/07/2013 at 3:09pm - love - by Sawarski - United States
Today, my brother thought New Year's would be more epic and memorable if the fireworks were set off in the family room and not outside. It is memorable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26483) - you deserved it (1909)
On 01/01/2013 at 1:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Monday 17 June 2013
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