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Sunday 30 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37530) - you deserved it (5235)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking in the park, when a kid ran up and hit me in the stomach. He said, "Don't get mad, get glad!" and ran off. FML

Today, my brother learned how to fake cry. I've been catching shit for everything I've done and said near him ever since. FML

#20421301
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26212) - you deserved it (3019)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by everore - United States (Utah)

Today, both my car and my father's car were broken into. They stole my radio, purse, wallet, camera, and multiple items of clothing. What did they take from my dad's car? Some screwdrivers to rip my radio out of my dash. FML

#20443271
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20111) - you deserved it (4815)

On 01/05/2013 at 12:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML

#20442068
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19832) - you deserved it (7175)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, during the countdown to midnight, I looked for my girlfriend so I could kiss her as 2013 began. I found her just in time to see her making out with some guy she swore was "only a friend." FML

#20435586
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46208) - you deserved it (3313)

On 01/01/2013 at 2:50am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27486) - you deserved it (3713)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

#20434488
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36474) - you deserved it (3250)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by _The__Doctor_ (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs for women. When I asked them what they were for, he said he wanted to spice up our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML

#20438198
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40583) - you deserved it (6249)

On 01/02/2013 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12083) - you deserved it (41700)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, was my birthday. Today was also the day that my mom's cat died four years ago. She was too busy crying and looking at old photos of her beloved cat to even wish me a happy birthday. FML

#20444416
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26133) - you deserved it (2027)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Birthday girl (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I had to slowly explain to my mother that Americans are not the only people who celebrate Christmas. FML

#20419656
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29887) - you deserved it (2604)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my dad asked me when I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly, I told him next year. He got pissed, started to yell, then realized Tuesday is New Year's Day and grounded me for "being a dumbass." FML

#20432925
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29537) - you deserved it (8534)

On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States



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