Monday 10 December 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I brought my 6-year-old to the mall to sit on Santa's lap. She told him what she wanted and smiled for the picture. When the lady told her that her turn was over, she began throwing a fit, pulling off Santa's beard in the process. This caused all the kids in line to begin sobbing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22350) - you deserved it (779)
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25662) - you deserved it (5292)
On 12/10/2012 at 2:21am - love - by Tonguetied0496 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16310) - you deserved it (1253)
On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21661) - you deserved it (10678)
On 12/16/2012 at 1:25am - intimacy - by Steve - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I took my driver's test. I was confident and thought everything would go well. My boss ended up calling me several times during the test. Turns out my colleague never showed up to cover for me, and my boss blamed me. Not only did I fail my test, I'm now suspended from work too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16148) - you deserved it (1506)
On 12/13/2012 at 12:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bromley)
Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22870) - you deserved it (1489)
On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)
Today, my daughter wore my favorite Christmas sweater to an ugly sweater party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14668) - you deserved it (6295)
On 12/12/2012 at 11:05am - kids - by Saduglydad - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw a photo on Instagram of my friend flipping the camera the bird. She'd tagged it under "irony", so I jokingly suggested that she borrow a dictionary. She responded with a tirade of abuse, claimed to be sleeping with my boyfriend, and blocked me an hour later. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15818) - you deserved it (2057)
On 12/13/2012 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I took a relaxing bath, but got the book I was reading slightly wet when getting out. I put it on top of the towel dryer after delicately shaking it. Five minutes later, I heard a splash; I went into the bathroom to find that my book had toppled into the toilet bowl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9083) - you deserved it (15900)
On 12/17/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by LemmyIsWet (man) - United States
Today, I accidentally left my textbook at home. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but today was my class final. Since it was an open-book final, I'd decided not to study for it. I'm pretty sure I failed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6265) - you deserved it (21725)
On 12/12/2012 at 2:14pm - misc - by dumbassgrad - United States (California)
Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17285) - you deserved it (1689)
On 12/13/2012 at 3:58am - health - by meranda_johnson - United States
Today, my family went on a family trip without me. Their reason for not bringing me? My older sister wanted extra legroom during the drive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20601) - you deserved it (1017)
On 12/10/2012 at 2:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, after several years spent hung up on my ex, I was finally moving on. I was on a date with my new boyfriend when my ex walked past us. He broke down crying, got on his knees, and begged me to come back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26380) - you deserved it (2501)
On 12/16/2012 at 6:57pm - love - by Miki (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
