Monday 10 December 2012 
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Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14218) - you deserved it (2947)
On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24941) - you deserved it (9323)
On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19852) - you deserved it (3293)
On 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, my fiancé called off our engagement after I contested his belief that women stop having periods after they are married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26949) - you deserved it (2838)
On 12/17/2012 at 7:29pm - love - by kidyounot (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24489) - you deserved it (9698)
On 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15485) - you deserved it (1416)
On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States
Today, my best friend told me about a vicious rumor that's going around, saying I contracted a horrible STD. I asked her if she told everyone it was a lie. She said no, because the rumor is apparently "way too funny to ruin." Maybe it's time for new friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20757) - you deserved it (1763)
On 12/13/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Katie (woman) - United States
Today, I'm insanely hungover from a long night of drinking. I'm going to my nephew's baptism in an hour as his godmother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4589) - you deserved it (34341)
On 12/16/2012 at 12:26pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21991) - you deserved it (3549)
On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States
Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21506) - you deserved it (1672)
On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23107) - you deserved it (1232)
On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)
Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15570) - you deserved it (1482)
On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States
Today, my ex adopted a dog from the dog pound. It was the same dog he made me get rid of while we were still together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19285) - you deserved it (5055)
On 12/16/2012 at 12:49am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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