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Sunday 9 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I finally felt motivated to do some exercise. As I got my weights out, I noticed out of the corner of my eye someone moving about outside my window. I got scared and dropped a weight on my foot. The person outside was my own reflection. FML

#20195266
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18619) - you deserved it (8668)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:10pm - health - by i see fat people (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML

#20188897
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20640) - you deserved it (2756)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:18am - health - by Gahh... (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML

#20198676
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34717) - you deserved it (6779)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:21am - love - by Tonguetied0496 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally left my textbook at home. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but today was my class final. Since it was an open-book final, I'd decided not to study for it. I'm pretty sure I failed. FML

#20201964
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9374) - you deserved it (35618)

On 12/12/2012 at 2:14pm - misc - by dumbassgrad - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23520) - you deserved it (3185)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML

#20197436
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24145) - you deserved it (2631)

On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer, who was upset over having waited twenty minutes for a waiter to come take her order. Maybe it would be understandable, if she was sitting in an actual restaurant, and not a serve-yourself coffee house. FML

#20194179
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24220) - you deserved it (1421)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML

#20196764
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25541) - you deserved it (1958)

On 12/08/2012 at 7:25pm - health - by ko - United States (Illinois)

Today, after several years spent hung up on my ex, I was finally moving on. I was on a date with my new boyfriend when my ex walked past us. He broke down crying, got on his knees, and begged me to come back. FML

#20402543
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36739) - you deserved it (3814)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:57pm - love - by Miki (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was pulled over and administered a sobriety test due to an officer's suspicion that I was driving under the influence. I was completely sober, and, apparently, I suck at driving. FML

#20401642
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20054) - you deserved it (10991)

On 12/16/2012 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

#20193519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19418) - you deserved it (3084)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:30am - misc - by chinousmc - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that storing a partially empty bowl of ice cream in the freezer overnight along with the spoon, and then trying to take a bite the next day, can have the same effect as sticking your tongue on a flagpole in the middle of winter. FML

#20195063
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6760) - you deserved it (28970)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by Moose (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML

#20397583
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24390) - you deserved it (2323)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:58am - health - by meranda_johnson - United States



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