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Sunday 9 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, Some Beefd-up Guy Wearing A Wife-beater Sat In Restaurant, Took Out A Big Sack Of Coins, And Playd My Little Pony Songs On The Jukebox Fir 4 Hours Straight. I Couldn't Summon The Courage To Tell Him To Leave.

#20401192
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22800) - you deserved it (5262)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm - work - by lingling (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, mah girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. mega FML

#20199046
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11351) - you deserved it (38405)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today , my bast friand announcad sha was gatting marriad . I'va alway wantad to ba a bridasmaid but sha than addad , ( You can't ba in tha bridal party bacausa you don't hava tha sama body typa as tha othar bridasmaids . But you can still coma to tha bachaloratta party! ) maga FML

#20194701
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29701) - you deserved it (2468)

On 12/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by SBCR (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went on a blind date!! My date turnd out to be very hot, an I had high hopes!! That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approachd, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff an dead skin floating through the air behind her!! FML

#20197946
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21618) - you deserved it (7171)

On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)

Today, I cummed home to find looool a mouse in the garage!! Frantic, I killed it!! My 7-year-old son cummed home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr!! Whiskers!! I killed my son's class pet!! FML

#20194994
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27679) - you deserved it (16169)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Yesterday, I facd a dilemma . If I don't let te cat sleep in my bedroom, se spends all nigt owling at te door, waking up my 2-year-old in te process . If I do let er in, te dog gets distressd an cews te contents of te bin . If I let bot of tem in, I ave no room to sleep . FML

I steppd on te scale an realizd tat I weig more tan te amount of money tat I ave in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25169) - you deserved it (7247)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, mah very cheap boyfriend of four yeres proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later looool overwhelmed with emotion when mah finger turned green.

#20201870
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (3931)

On 12/12/2012 at 12:51pm - love - by dino0123 - United States (Virginia)

Today... the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloadd a picture of a huge... hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone... as every time I try... the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML

#20200411
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28534) - you deserved it (5782)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by skinnybitch (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

today mah son got suspendd from school . He's in kindergarten . fat FML

#20201910
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27092) - you deserved it (6715)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today , in my AP Biology class , a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming , tohich my friend gushed , "Yeah! It's been melted for , like , months." FML

#20193921
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (1849)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son wat he wanted 4 Christmas, a stranger cummed up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parent are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fucker says." FML

#20200046
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30175) - you deserved it (2903)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:15am - kids - by n1a1t1h1a1n1 (man) - United States (California)

TODAY, I TOLD GIRLFRIEND TAT I'M BREAKING UP WIT ER CUZ SE'S VERY ABUSIVE. AFTER A COUPLE OF SECONDS OF AWKWARD SILENCE, SE KICKED ME IN TE NUTS AN RAN AWAY. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28635) - you deserved it (3802)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada



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