Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

#20398504
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24591) - you deserved it (4702) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when he suddenly grabbed my front. He said, in a sexy voice, "Is that your boob?". He had grabbed a fat roll. FML

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

#20189050
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17042) - you deserved it (1165)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML

#20191114
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8614) - you deserved it (13701)

On 12/04/2012 at 4:34pm - work - by Adan - United States (Washington)

Today, at school, I have to do a 45 minute presentation with a girl who has panic attacks so bad that she cries, runs out of the room, and sometimes passes out. This presentation terrifies her and it's a major part of my final grade. FML

#20192286
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18852) - you deserved it (1717)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by Murlocmurk - United States

Today, I jokingly tried to convince my girlfriend that Wyoming was a government conspiracy and did not exist. She believed me. FML

#20193447
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13632) - you deserved it (3698)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:24am - misc - by whaleninjapoop - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML

#20200321
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19943) - you deserved it (2091)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22574) - you deserved it (4419)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML

#20193528
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18993) - you deserved it (3009)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50am - love - by FMyEx - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML

#20199177
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26112) - you deserved it (9913)

On 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

#20198660
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21408) - you deserved it (1374)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Alec (man) - United States

Today, I had to get to class at 9:00 to take a test. I woke up at 6:00, and figured I could wait a few minutes before getting ready. The next thing I knew, it was 10:30. FML

#20200420
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17957) - you deserved it (18514)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26581) - you deserved it (1645)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: