Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Thursday 6 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML

#20199177
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35197) - you deserved it (14581)

On 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28367) - you deserved it (6129)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML

#20193528
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24064) - you deserved it (4105)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50am - love - by FMyEx - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29362) - you deserved it (1841)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to get to class at 9:00 to take a test. I woke up at 6:00, and figured I could wait a few minutes before getting ready. The next thing I knew, it was 10:30. FML

#20200420
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20395) - you deserved it (21277)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML

#20192452
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22270) - you deserved it (2644)

On 12/05/2012 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML

#20196242
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26633) - you deserved it (4765)

On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML

#20193303
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23874) - you deserved it (4627)

On 12/06/2012 at 12:35am - work - by SpanishInFrenchClass (woman) - United States

Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML

#20191703
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23299) - you deserved it (3642)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was my turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." FML

#20201674
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27913) - you deserved it (2207)

On 12/12/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by sushichick (woman) - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

#20195284
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21864) - you deserved it (2601)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML

#20200321
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21107) - you deserved it (2181)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: