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Thursday 6 December 2012

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Today, my boyfriend and I had a disagreement over the pronunciation of the word "train." It turned into a heated debate that lasted all night and ended with us sleeping in separate rooms. FML

by superminty / 12/04/2012 at 3:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice, kind, beautiful, talented, funny, sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

by ouch. / 12/08/2012 at 5:44am / Canada (Yukon Territory) / Love

Today, my roommate turned the thermostat down to 50 degrees. Why? Because she read that shivering burns calories. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 12:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone / 12/13/2012 at 9:35am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I made a positive remark to the owner of my local groceries store for employing a special needs girl. Not only is the girl not mentally handicapped, she's also the owner's daughter. FML

by Vassy / 12/04/2012 at 1:51pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

by Devil / 12/11/2012 at 1:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation

Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML

by mom / 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

by hailey / 12/10/2012 at 12:10am / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML

by hnickell93 / 12/10/2012 at 1:37pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm / Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan) / Animals

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

by Money-money-money / 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm / France / Money

Today, my boyfriend got done with Marine combat training. The first thing he asked for weren't pictures of me but pictures of his car. Missed you too babe. FML

by chels / 12/10/2012 at 2:47am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

by you're just creepy. / 12/11/2012 at 3:39am / Canada (Yukon Territory) / Love