Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Friday 30 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today mah cat peed on mah bra !! I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work 4 mah 12-hour shift !! Now I'm trying to wash mah bra out in the sink an stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture !! Only 10 more hours to go an the smell of cat pee is still lingering !! FML

#20185014
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21274) - you deserved it (4157)

On 11/30/2012 at 3:33am - work - by onlyslightly (woman) - United States

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad . She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water . FML

#20187648
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26586) - you deserved it (2589)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I was shopping when I overheard a woman telling an employee that she was buying an iPad for her 5-year-old son. Annoyd, I turnd around and rantd about how he should have more age appropriate toys. Then she explaind that her son is autistic and will be using the iPad to communicate. mega FML

#20183504
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8507) - you deserved it (84717)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:29am - misc - by Mimi - United States

Today, I heard a teenage boy ask his friend, ( So, is it, like, November in Australia too? ) This is the future of America.

#20179140
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24957) - you deserved it (2473)

On 11/26/2012 at 12:27am - kids - by toritoratora - United States (California)

YESTERDAY, MAH HUSBAND QUIT HIS JOB AS A UNIVERSITY PROFESSOR AND PICKD UP THE GRAVEYARD SHIFT AT A RAT FARM SO HE COULD HAVE MORE TIME DURING THE DAY TO PLAY WORLD OF WARCRAFT. FML

#20182185
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32273) - you deserved it (3002)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today , I ran into mah sister,ho nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML

#20179890
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31078) - you deserved it (3544)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I'm Recovering In The Emergency Room. How Did I Get Here? Intoxicatd At A Cod Party, I Saw A Hole In The Host's Shd And Thought It Funny To Christen It A "glory-hole", Only To Be Bitten By Wat May Well Have Been A Black Widow Spider. Big Fat FML

#20182587
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6416) - you deserved it (43336)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)

Today , While Lighting A Cigarette , I Learned The Hard Way That The Amount Of Styling Mousse I Used To Get My Curly Hair To Become Manageable , Is The Roughly Same Amount That Causes It To Become Highly Flammable. FML

#20186892
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9630) - you deserved it (27316)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm - health - by Awkward (woman) - Bahrain

Today , in my AP Biology class , a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming , tohich my friend gushed , "Yeah! It's been melted for , like , months." FML

#20193921
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (1849)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, mah wife wants to name our frst child Sri, after the iPhone function!! FML

#20182157
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26720) - you deserved it (2552)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)

Today , I was watching a video from the 80s on sexual dysfunctions , and I noticd that one of the boys in the film looool lookd strangely like mah dadhen he was younger!! After a little investigation , I now know that in his youth , mah dad had a crippling masturbation problem!! FML

#20181345
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42247) - you deserved it (3719)

On 11/27/2012 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Yesterday Two Of My Friend Condemned Me Fir Being "narrow-minded", Cuz I Couldn't Help But Laugh At The Thought That Someone Would Believe Mermaid Actually Exist. FML

#20185421
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17723) - you deserved it (4341)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:29pm - misc - by so pray to ariel about it, dipshits (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

TODAY, I TOLD GIRLFRIEND TAT I'M BREAKING UP WIT ER CUZ SE'S VERY ABUSIVE. AFTER A COUPLE OF SECONDS OF AWKWARD SILENCE, SE KICKED ME IN TE NUTS AN RAN AWAY. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28635) - you deserved it (3802)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: