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Saturday 24 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to the Apple store to try and figure out what's going on with my iPhone. After an hour of speaking to three different geniuses and waiting around, their solution was to "Google it." FML

#20171869
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25153) - you deserved it (3760)

On 11/21/2012 at 12:42am - misc - by Jo - United States (California)

Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML

#20175044
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13512) - you deserved it (26729)

On 11/23/2012 at 10:10am - animals - by Jeanna S. - United States

Today, my mom had a tantrum and screamed at me over my use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch and claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML

#20176711
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14634) - you deserved it (16815)

On 11/24/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by Anonymous Cunt (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my girlfriend of 6 months yelled at me for not comforting her while she was crying because her ex got a new girlfriend, and "it's just not fair." FML

#20169074
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33068) - you deserved it (2504)

On 11/19/2012 at 2:13am - love - by they've been broken up for a year. - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

#20169340
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38782) - you deserved it (4775)

On 11/19/2012 at 10:12am - intimacy - by nextcontestant16 - United States

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

#20185787
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40550) - you deserved it (3785)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by julia (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend started bawling, saying that our relationship wouldn't work. Why? Because if Justin and Selena can't do it, no one can. FML

#20178699
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31959) - you deserved it (3657)

On 11/25/2012 at 7:55pm - love - by nonbelieber (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

#20170605
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15513) - you deserved it (34849)

On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I ran into my boss outside of work. She smiled, and started trying to have an in-depth chat with me. I wouldn't have minded, if it weren't for the fact I ran into her at a club, whilst they were having an S and M theme night. And we were both fully dressed up for it. FML

#20172556
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22993) - you deserved it (4428)

On 11/21/2012 at 3:43pm - work - by jobsearching (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, I witnessed a robbery as a teenager ran out of a Walgreens with stolen goods in his hands. The manager was running after him. Trying to be helpful, I pulled forward to block the thief from getting away. The cops showed up and arrested me for hitting a pedestrian. FML

#20169022
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27906) - you deserved it (4938)

On 11/19/2012 at 1:18am - misc - by ausmill12 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I've now worked on Thanksgiving, Black Friday, the weekend after that, and two days this week. My husband and son have had all that time off, and yet I've still ended up having to clean the dishes and the house after them on all of these days. FML

#20181186
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28342) - you deserved it (5374)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:05pm - work - by bored - United States

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

#20182568
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26793) - you deserved it (2265)

On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)



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