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Friday 16 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML

#20165849
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21114) - you deserved it (3774)

On 11/16/2012 at 8:06pm - work - by wow @ creepy fuckers (man) - United States

Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML

#20161493
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20527) - you deserved it (4397)

On 11/13/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by sarahcurtis213 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML

#20170839
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8331) - you deserved it (24737)

On 11/20/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Brian (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML

#20163899
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18193) - you deserved it (1365)

On 11/15/2012 at 12:48am - love - by B-Rad (man) - United States

Today, I had to take my little brother to the pool. He acted like a brat the whole time, and when I told him we were leaving, he ran away, slipped, and hit his face on the tile floor. He told my dad and step-mom I punched him. They believed him, and I'm grounded for two months. FML

#20167155
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25721) - you deserved it (1540)

On 11/17/2012 at 7:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was so bored with my job at McDonald's that I actually hoped someone would come in and make a huge mess for me to clean. No one did. FML

#20173284
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13848) - you deserved it (2509)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:44am - work - by Ophelia - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my girlfriend admitted to me that she has been sleeping with someone on her girls basketball team, which at first turned me on. Then I found out he's the team manager. FML

#20164114
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23783) - you deserved it (7912)

On 11/15/2012 at 8:37am - love - by SweetStuff88 (man) - United States

Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML

#20172916
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10269) - you deserved it (25625)

On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

#20161591
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22857) - you deserved it (2311)

On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, the love of my life, and long term partner, sat me down and told me that he feels so comfortable in our relationship that he no longer feels the need to have sex with me, and he doesn't think that that will ever change. FML

#20162862
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27955) - you deserved it (2733)

On 11/14/2012 at 5:36am - intimacy - by nolove - Australia

Today, I have a tooth infection that's spread to my jaw and ear. It hurts so badly that I'm practically in tears. Today's also the day I found out I'm allergic to the medication I was prescribed. Everything hurts, I'm covered in hives, and I can't stop throwing up. FML

#20165827
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29445) - you deserved it (1652)

On 11/16/2012 at 7:30pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Croatia (Primorsko-Goranska)

Today, my boyfriend and I cleaned his parents' whole house while they were out, just to be nice. When they came home, they assumed we only did it because we'd made some huge mess that we needed to hide. I'm now banned from their house. FML

#20164583
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20140) - you deserved it (1732)

On 11/15/2012 at 6:34pm - love - by teea (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

#20166401
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19426) - you deserved it (3843)

On 11/17/2012 at 8:34am - love - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)



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