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Wednesday 14 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30006) - you deserved it (8545)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I discovered that no matter how hot and exhausted you are, being blasted in the face with a high pressure hose is always more painful than refreshing. FML

#20165112
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17813) - you deserved it (9904)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

#20170511
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23069) - you deserved it (3222)

On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML

#20170919
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28290) - you deserved it (8863)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by notAMrs (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend of three years, whom I recently got engaged to, asked me to take a photo of my mother's boobs while she was sleeping so that he could see what mine would look like when I got older. FML

#20160220
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33981) - you deserved it (3842)

On 11/12/2012 at 8:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML

#20162804
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25055) - you deserved it (1762)

On 11/14/2012 at 2:46am - love - by he's mine (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I have an ear infection. The pain from it radiates from my ear all the way down the left side of my face, so my doctor prescribed me something that makes half of my face numb and pretty much unusable. Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation on strokes for my med class. Go figure. FML

#20170659
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26443) - you deserved it (1795)

On 11/20/2012 at 5:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at the age of 29, I now have a relationship on par with a teenager's. Several weeks ago, my fiancé and I lost our home, and are now back living with our respective families. We now have no privacy. I actually just got dropped off at home, before 10, after having sex in a hay field. FML

#20168945
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35114) - you deserved it (4788)

On 11/19/2012 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I put on a shirt that said "skilled in every position." My boyfriend took one look and said, "since when?" FML

#20167475
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11243) - you deserved it (28998)

On 11/18/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend and I had amazing make-up sex after a huge fight. Turns out he forgot to let me know it was actually break-up sex. FML

Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML

#20164356
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19941) - you deserved it (2322)

On 11/15/2012 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to pick up her things. I decided to take a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML

#20170390
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25402) - you deserved it (3291)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:03am - love - by Chris (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my older brother thought it would be hilarious to sneak up and scare me in the grocery aisle at the store. I screamed and jumped, knocking half the shelf's contents all over the floor. We're now banned from the only grocery store in town. FML

#20166242
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24420) - you deserved it (2982)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by sarahhbear - United States (Texas)



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