Saturday 10 November 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20419) - you deserved it (3727)
On 11/16/2012 at 8:06pm - work - by wow @ creepy fuckers (man) - United States
Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24270) - you deserved it (1056)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by Screwed - United States (Maryland)
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (15273) - you deserved it (1939)
On 11/09/2012 at 7:16pm - health - by dating a fking cnt (man) - Canada
Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19175) - you deserved it (1752)
On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)
Today, the love of my life, and long term partner, sat me down and told me that he feels so comfortable in our relationship that he no longer feels the need to have sex with me, and he doesn't think that that will ever change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23983) - you deserved it (2356)
Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18871) - you deserved it (3774)
On 11/17/2012 at 8:34am - love - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)
Today, I woke up with a wax strip on my chest and my girlfriend sitting next to me on the bed laughing. She pulled the strip. I screamed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22326) - you deserved it (2976)
On 11/06/2012 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Ugggggggggg (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, after being a germaphobe for almost ten years and refusing to go out to restaurants because of it, I finally had the courage to face my fear, and went to dinner with my family. After three bites into my salad, I found a dead bug in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (2007)
On 11/06/2012 at 1:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, after finishing a test, I decided to draw to pass the time. My teacher looked at the drawing and gave me a referral to the principal for drawing an "anti-Semitic picture." I'd drawn Superman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13622) - you deserved it (943)
On 11/15/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Superman (man) - United States (California)
Today, I looked up the side effects of the antidepressants I've recently started taking. Inability to orgasm is one of them. I can either not be depressed, or I can have an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20353) - you deserved it (2601)
On 11/05/2012 at 2:25pm - intimacy - by HappinessOrOrgasms (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my girlfriend decided to invite her best friend over for a threesome. This would've been the best day ever, had I not been at work while it was taking place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26847) - you deserved it (2263)
On 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by sadness1992 - United States (California)
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12166) - you deserved it (21878)
On 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by shit.... (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, my boyfriend of three years, whom I recently got engaged to, asked me to take a photo of my mother's boobs while she was sleeping so that he could see what mine would look like when I got older. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20467) - you deserved it (2196)
On 11/12/2012 at 8:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
