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March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, of the two IDs I possess, I handed the cop that pulled me over the fake one. FML

#20545967
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10481) - you deserved it (68661)

On 03/16/2013 at 10:58am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while I was going down on my husband, our 3-year-old daughter woke up and started crying from the other room. He practically burst into tears too, whining that she was doing it on purpose to ruin his fun. He was serious. FML

#20544502
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52032) - you deserved it (5893)

On 03/15/2013 at 6:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

Today, after getting a new haircut, I decided to take a few photos. I set up my iPhone in my room and began posing. It wasn't until numerous shots later that I realized my phone had posted every picture to Facebook, and they were all over everyone's newsfeed. FML

#20561054
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17422) - you deserved it (43433)

On 03/26/2013 at 2:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my step-mom stole over $100 in cash from me, dumped dirty cat litter all over my clean bed sheets, and called me a whore for having a polite conversation with my boyfriend. I confronted my father about it. He told me to forgive her, because she's "on her period." FML

#20533543
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41635) - you deserved it (2542)

On 03/06/2013 at 2:11pm - misc - by disgruntled stepdaughter - United States (Ohio)

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

#20537800
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32021) - you deserved it (8455)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while having sex with my husband, he went soft. When I asked him what happened he said, "I'm about to fall asleep." He then plopped down on my chest and began to snore. FML

#20536683
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43425) - you deserved it (5676)

On 03/09/2013 at 3:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML

#20556944
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40638) - you deserved it (5014)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

#20564887
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37332) - you deserved it (3170)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:37am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40308) - you deserved it (3123)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34699) - you deserved it (3837)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a small fly flew straight up into my nose. I spent 10 minutes trying to blow/scratch/pick it out to no avail. I can still feel it moving. FML

#20556028
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40795) - you deserved it (2816)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:17am - misc - by WTFLY (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I discovered that the neck injury that my mom has had since last week was planned just as an excuse not to shovel when today's snowstorm came. She has planned on being lazy for over a week now. FML

#20533403
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28521) - you deserved it (2896)

On 03/06/2013 at 10:16am - misc - by Drew (man) - United States (Virginia)



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