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February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 weeks after emergency abdominal surgery, my girlfriend, who didn't even bother to ask how I was, made me hobble to her house just to dump me and send me straight back home. FML

#20511268
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35497) - you deserved it (2587)

On 02/17/2013 at 8:28pm - love - by noname - United States (New York)

Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML

#20506184
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10491) - you deserved it (39432)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:18am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

#20516811
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6917) - you deserved it (45326)

On 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had an important job interview at another company. I'd tried to keep it secret from everyone at work, so they wouldn't tell my boss, as I can't afford to get on his bad side yet. My mom posted on my Facebook wall, wishing me luck. I'm Facebook friends with most of my colleagues. FML

#20525834
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24646) - you deserved it (10458)

On 02/28/2013 at 4:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, really desperate to get a job, I filled out an application for a dishwashing job. My application got tossed out, because I'm not an economics major like the other guy applying for the same job. FML

#20500922
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26433) - you deserved it (2237)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I got a new roommate after having a horrible relationship with the previous one. She seemed nice at first, until our first night together. She got completely wasted, spilled beer all over my bed and blew chunks into my fish tank. FML

#20513351
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28378) - you deserved it (2594)

On 02/19/2013 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML

#20506765
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34666) - you deserved it (2166)

On 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)

Today, my downstairs neighbours screamed at me for making so much noise that I woke their children up and made them cry. The noise was the sound of a loose floorboard shifting as I crept to my bathroom, and again on my way back to bed. They've sworn to get me evicted. FML

#20497288
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (2115)

On 02/07/2013 at 5:56pm - misc - by fineillpissthebedthen (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me out after I spelt "realised" with an S instead of a Z. It wouldn't have been so bad, if we weren't both British, if he hadn't called me an "illiterate idiot", and if he hadn't muttered "family of morons" when my mum backed me up. FML

#20519170
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27899) - you deserved it (4326)

On 02/23/2013 at 6:18pm - love - by singleandthankful (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML

#20524817
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28171) - you deserved it (3487)

On 02/27/2013 at 7:42pm - misc - by forgotten - United States (Arizona)

Today, I locked my keys in my truck. The good news is that I have a spare set in my house. The bad news is that my house key is on the same keyring as my locked-in truck key. FML

#20521895
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25029) - you deserved it (8901)

On 02/25/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by burning balls of fuck this - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML

#20517081
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12139) - you deserved it (30736)

On 02/22/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by shelbylove115 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML

#20516248
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32434) - you deserved it (2285)

On 02/21/2013 at 1:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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