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December 2012

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Today, my husband told my mother-in-law that we're trying to have a baby. She decided to call me and explain in extreme detail what positions to try, and when. FML

#20403715
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44320) - you deserved it (4846)

On 12/17/2012 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by crazy mother in law (woman) -

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28290) - you deserved it (1962)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States

Today, my dad got a warning from our ISP for going well over their fair usage limit. I barely use our wifi, and I keep telling him he should password-protect our router to stop people leeching our Internet. He's blaming me anyway, and says I'm grounded until January. FML

#20195319
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25940) - you deserved it (1857)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:49pm - misc - by WPA2 OR DEATH (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

#20415890
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17845) - you deserved it (49468)

On 12/23/2012 at 10:02am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I had to create a perfect society in English class; the best society has their grade go up a full letter. After tons of preparation and thinking, I lost to an island made only of cheese. FML

#20200774
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24502) - you deserved it (2216)

On 12/11/2012 at 6:03pm - misc - by JPPUDLY (man) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

#20193017
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26793) - you deserved it (2634)

On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML

#20196242
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30408) - you deserved it (5188)

On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35324) - you deserved it (3674)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had a look through my dad's girlfriend's phone she left on the table. Best part: I now know what I'm getting for christmas. Worst part: I now know my dad's favourite position. FML

#20413212
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15813) - you deserved it (74169)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I found out that the tinsel on my Christmas tree is worth a couple of hundred euros per strand. Well, that's how much the two that were surgically removed from my cat have cost me. At least the cat's going to be fine. FML

#20410843
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20443) - you deserved it (13017)

On 12/21/2012 at 5:02am - animals - by I Like My Cat (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29133) - you deserved it (3886)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my mom found her CD of cats and dogs singing Christmas songs. That is what I'll be listening to until Christmas. FML

#20186305
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23200) - you deserved it (1886)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:00am - misc - by hinowdie - United States

Today, while trying to take my Christmas tree down, I learned that at some point during the last few weeks, it became home to a colony of green ants. I'm now covered in bites and terrified to go anywhere near it. FML

#20426337
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28540) - you deserved it (3005)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:54pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia



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