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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I woke up to a gift from my boyfriend: a Playboy magazine with a Post-It note that said, "Just a reminder that you're easily replaceable." I think he's still mad at me for beating him on X-box. FML

#20137933
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23361) - you deserved it (2911)

On 10/28/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by becca (woman) - United States

Today, after having loaned my girlfriend money after she claimed to be broke and unable to pay her rent and electricity bills, she went out, spent it all on a new purse and phone, and now refuses to pay me back. FML

#20123887
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15760) - you deserved it (4227)

On 10/19/2012 at 1:05pm - money - by asparagus piss (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that I spend the same amount of money on my phone bill as I do on Nutella. FML

#20123737
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5615) - you deserved it (15696)

On 10/19/2012 at 10:19am - health - by Nutellalover (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, after being totally in love with a guy since middle school, I finally had enough self confidence to go and talk to him. Turns out he's boring as fuck. I obsessed over this guy for nearly 4 years. FML

#20123261
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9151) - you deserved it (29244)

On 10/18/2012 at 10:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I went bowling. I noticed a 10-year-old holding an iPod Touch which had the exact same customized case with my name on it as my iPod that was stolen a year ago at the same bowling centre. Even better, the parents yelled at me for accusing him. I got kicked out the bowling centre. FML

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14258) - you deserved it (55658)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my fiancé spent three hours arguing with his mom about how Scientology is a cult followed by simple-minded asshats; she shouted at him saying Xenu will come and fuck his shit up for not believing. This woman is going to be my children's grandmother. FML

#20117718
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18937) - you deserved it (1972)

On 10/15/2012 at 3:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa

Today, my roommate set her extremely loud alarm clock for 5am and continued to hit the snooze button every ten minutes until 7:30. FML

#20110486
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22812) - you deserved it (1525)

On 10/10/2012 at 1:38pm - misc - by tiredofthis - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got a text message from my boss that read, "You've been very bad. Severe punishment is in order." I'm not sure whether I should be turned on or terrified. FML

#20110308
153 comments

Today, I tried to tell my best friend how wrong she is to be dating a married man, whose wife happens to be pregnant with their first child. Our talk ended with her calling me a "meddling, frigid bitch" and me being told this is why I can't get laid. FML

#20125357
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19477) - you deserved it (1664)

On 10/20/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Dillyduzit (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is four months pregnant. She can't wait for us to be parents. I guess she forgot that I haven't seen her in 7 months. FML

#20118231
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33724) - you deserved it (1995)

On 10/15/2012 at 4:27pm - love - by 3023-dang - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 3 months got mad at me because I thought she was attractive. She has an identical twin, and she says if I think she's attractive, I must want her twin too. FML

#20107518
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24795) - you deserved it (1480)

On 10/08/2012 at 2:36pm - love - by jack - United States (Illinois)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, she asked me to whisper her name. Apparently, her name is not Kate. FML

#20140315
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9693) - you deserved it (67546)

On 10/30/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by you (man) - United Kingdom



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