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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13499) - you deserved it (59613)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, I had to pry my sister's used tampon out from between my dog's jaws. FML

#20104660
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25750) - you deserved it (1797)

On 10/06/2012 at 6:58pm - animals - by banj0 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I forgot to pay for my train ride for the first time. Today was also the first time I've ever seen transit security checking for people's tickets and kicking offenders off. FML

#20125823
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20807) - you deserved it (5111)

On 10/20/2012 at 9:59pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom screeched at me about my pillowcase being dirty and finished off one long rant with an irate "Who raised you to be such a pig?" Her anger multiplied by ten when I asked if it was a trick question. FML

#20098049
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20404) - you deserved it (6951)

On 10/02/2012 at 6:29am - misc - by kira (woman) - United States

Today, despite my pain, my mom still refuses to take me to a foot doctor because, "They all have foot fetishes." FML

#20132061
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21857) - you deserved it (1406)

On 10/24/2012 at 10:44pm - health - by illjustlimpthen (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, the guy I'm dating came into the same restaurant where I was eating. He was with a girl. He sat at the table next to mine and didn't even bother to say, "Hi." I guess I'm single again. FML

#20112854
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26156) - you deserved it (2027)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:48pm - love - by sadness - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was riding the subway home with some friends, and when I noticed something smelled awful. My friends noticed it too. After searching for the source of the smell, it became apparent that it was my breath. FML

#20096394
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16501) - you deserved it (16899)

On 10/01/2012 at 3:18am - health - by halitosis - United States (California)

Today, I bought professional hair clippers to shave down below, thinking it would be safer than using a razor. Let's just say the bathroom now looks like a murder scene, and it's going to be a while before I have sex again. FML

#20124733
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27672) - you deserved it (11713)

On 10/20/2012 at 12:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend's new favorite TV show is Law and Order SVU. Now after every episode she insists on asking me if I'm sure I wasn't molested as a kid. She's still on the first season. FML

#20123502
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19922) - you deserved it (1574)

On 10/19/2012 at 2:41am - misc - by soprahb - United States

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27028) - you deserved it (1907)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I contemplated the ratio of cats I have to friends I have. I need more friends. FML

#20122007
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16776) - you deserved it (4845)

On 10/18/2012 at 1:33am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

#20133155
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21484) - you deserved it (5323)

On 10/25/2012 at 7:09pm - love - by mental - United States

Today, I had a job interview for a job I've been dying to have. As I'm walking into the office, the manager says, "Aren't you my son's ex, the one he cheated on?" All I could do was sit there quietly as he laughed at me. FML

#20129479
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27223) - you deserved it (2176)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:54am - work - by emilyparra1 - United States (Florida)



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