Miscellaneous: Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad...

By inalotofpain - 16/04/2011 12:46 - United States

Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 467

You deserved it 3 906

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Same thing different taste

By Niles - 20/03/2012 17:46 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was taking a shower, when my dad decided to turn off the water to the house, run upstairs, and throw a bucket of freezing cold sludge into the shower with me. He wouldn't turn the water back on for 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 373

You deserved it 2 826

By Chris - 03/04/2011 17:41 - United States

Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 646

You deserved it 4 120

By francesa_loca - 14/10/2011 16:09 - Canada

Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 953

You deserved it 2 512

Backfire

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 20:10 - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 173

You deserved it 54 736

By mumblingdope - 25/05/2016 08:52 - Indonesia - Jakarta

Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 946

You deserved it 1 193

By ILiveWithMorons - 12/04/2011 03:07 - United States

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 389

You deserved it 3 342

By squeltorey - 03/08/2012 19:28 - United States - Whittier

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 817

You deserved it 11 164

By CoffeeStained - 10/11/2015 15:54 - United States - Richmond

Today, I set my cup of coffee down on the stall floor to take care of my business. A hand reached under the stall door and took my coffee. I yelled to give it back, calling them obscene names. Moments later, my fresh coffee came flying over the door. I'm burned from my head to my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 394

You deserved it 10 129

Bad start to the day

By Concussed - 17/01/2010 06:22 - Australia

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 722

You deserved it 6 055

By Anonymous - 10/01/2014 16:12 - United States - Shelbyville

Today, my boyfriend saw a YouTube video of a guy throwing boiling water into the cold air, with the water immediately turning to ice and vapor. He copied it, but only succeeded in dousing himself with boiling water, then making me drive his idiot self to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 308

You deserved it 5 686

RezaCookies 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:43

yeahh youd rather burn than be soothed by cold water huh.

Me654 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:41

Well shouldn't it cool you down a bit?

Comments

skittlezopz 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:52

atleast no one saw :)

NavySEAL13 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:23

ya but every one on fml knows

ackumm 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:53

WOW.

staceysgenesis16 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:54

bahahahaha wow .. thats a fail ..

I_iz_B_a_troll 23

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:54

Wait wait wait... Why'd he rush in in the first place?! That's all I care about. Your dads awesome! Sorry op (:

this_female 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 19:55

haha sucks to be you(;

Somedood117 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:05

THAT WOULD OF WORKED...if you were on fire.

samh444 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 23:01

please don't be stupid and use bad grammar like that...

lmaoatall 6

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:09

please tell me he threw flour on you afterwards!?!?

Barney_Rubble_75 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:36

ha ha ha! lol.

prettypinkpixie 9

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:10

How relaxing could drinking boiling coffee be? Your mouth would be burned if it was that hot.

guckylynn 19

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:44

Yeah that's what I was wondering.

threeze 0

Saturday 16 April 2011 22:24

I lol'd.

Crazyjoe33 6

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:11

yep

bubblekitty 1

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:14

I don't think your dad had an education.

lmaoatall 6

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:18

sure he did. clown school. I believe Holmer went there.

bubblekitty 1

Saturday 16 April 2011 20:30

true to that.

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Same thing different taste

Backfire

Bad start to the day

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