Animals: Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put...

By cricketsins - 14/05/2015 05:11 - United States

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 560

You deserved it 2 588

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Same thing different taste

By MushyKetchup - 14/08/2015 07:01 - United States - Amarillo

Today, a tarantula joined my stuffed animal collection in its drawer. It, unfortunately, wasn't stuffed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 207

You deserved it 1 987

By MyNameIsNotJeff - 08/05/2015 03:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 218

You deserved it 3 107

By Boyufd - 09/09/2018 03:30

Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 914

You deserved it 228

By Arachnaphobe - 03/06/2016 22:14 - United States - Bloomington

Today, a large spider climbed inside my lunchbox while my mom was making me sandwiches. She didn't tell me about it until after I got home from school, though, and only because I mentioned a strange aftertaste in the sandwiches. She said she didn't want me to worry over lunch because she knows I hate spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 532

You deserved it 1 066

I'm outta here

By Anonymous - 25/06/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend's recently mated tarantula disappeared from her enclosure with her egg sac, so she's now somewhere in the house with between 20 and 100 babies hatching within a week. I moved out this afternoon. My boyfriend caused this, he can damn well find her before I set foot in there again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 156

You deserved it 123

She definitely won though

By Anonymous - 24/08/2018 15:00

Today, as part of our prank war, my girlfriend found a hairy tarantula picture and stuck it on the wall. I hadn't yet told her I'm arachnophobic, and when I saw it I passed out and hit my head hard enough to need an ambulance. She decided she's won the war and I don't get a say in the matter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 640

You deserved it 799

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 314

You deserved it 7 643

By dre_bro11 - 06/11/2011 12:17 - Australia

Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 059

You deserved it 12 473

By Anonymous - 15/11/2010 21:31 - Ireland

Today, I accidentally left my sister's hamster's cage open and it escaped. My dad recently put mouse traps down. Guess where I found her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 907

You deserved it 34 843

By JustLeaveThem - 25/01/2017 18:00

Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 727

You deserved it 289

nanxi 30

Friday 15 May 2015 0:10

If this was a prank, your sister is an evil, evil genius.

cutycat136 28

Friday 15 May 2015 0:11

Prank? I'm sure if she is your sister she would know if you had a pet one or not

Comments

hushhh 4

Friday 15 May 2015 4:02

There's no tarantula. She's just messing with you.

worldclassrager 39

Friday 15 May 2015 4:16

I sure hope you are not afraid of spiders

IndefiniteBeauty 17

Friday 15 May 2015 4:25

Totally pranked you

MichelleMaBelle_fml 16

Friday 15 May 2015 4:31

CRISTO! GET THE SALT AND HOLY WATER!

CaptainRR 20

Friday 15 May 2015 4:39

There is a very simple solution to this. Have you heard of nuclear bombs?

cookie1207 19

Friday 15 May 2015 4:47

Hahaha holy spiders batman!

thejzabs 25

Friday 15 May 2015 5:32

She's BSing you. Guaranteed

Polynomial 28

Friday 15 May 2015 5:54

Best prank ever.

A_Net_70 7

Friday 15 May 2015 5:57

Hahahaa I have to try that! Lmao sorry

Drosophila82 18

Friday 15 May 2015 6:33

How often do you guys communicate! That sounds like she made it up to scare the living crap out of you!

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I agree, your life sucks 4 732

You deserved it 490

Today, my best friend’s girlfriend took his phone and blocked me on Facebook, all because I wrote him a heartfelt Happy Birthday message on his wall. I found out because he messaged me from another account explaining what happened. She refuses to understand that we’re strictly platonic friends. FML

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You deserved it 140

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I agree, your life sucks 47 443

You deserved it 3 626

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I agree, your life sucks 1 324

You deserved it 547

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 534

You deserved it 6 746

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I agree, your life sucks 27 953

You deserved it 4 501

Today, I married my best friend in the whole world at a small romantic venue. By that I mean I married my actual best mate while completely hammered at a drive-through wedding chapel. My fiancée is gonna kill me when she finds out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 314

You deserved it 4 831

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 635

You deserved it 2 451

Same thing different taste

I'm outta here

She definitely won though

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