Animals: Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard....

By Tali - 28/07/2011 06:18 - Australia

Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 675

You deserved it 3 330

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Same thing different taste

By catfriend - 06/05/2014 05:42 - United States - Salida

Today, my husband's cat died. He has resorted to calling me by her name to comfort himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 999

You deserved it 4 840

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 07/10/2016 20:22 - Switzerland

Today, the cat climbed up to the spice shelf while I was cooking. As I looked up and told him to leave, he tipped over a chili container which coated my face with chili powder. The bloody pain in my eyes then made me knock over a pot of boiling water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 958

You deserved it 1 165

By jsmills92 - 21/12/2012 00:26 - United States - Cranston

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 414

You deserved it 4 442

By Wow - 01/08/2015 19:06 - United States - Sanford

Today, I walked outside to see my dog killing my cat. My spouse tried to cheer me up - "Hey, at least we don't have to buy cat food anymore!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 912

You deserved it 3 325

By confusedcatlover - 06/04/2013 11:42 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 259

You deserved it 6 220

The Lovecats

By Anonymous - 19/10/2021 05:00 - United States

Today, after my husband got ready for work, he touched my arm and slowly bent down. I assumed he was going to say he loved me and to have a good day. As I quickly thought of a loving response and prepared to give him a kiss, he whispered in my ear, "Did you put a dead mouse in the toilet?" Thanks a lot, cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 125

Is gift

By catlady - 25/08/2015 03:16 - United States - Clifton Park

Today, I awoke at two in the morning to my cat putting his most recent kill on my chest. When I jumped up screaming, the dead mouse went flying and now my husband and I can't find it. Better yet, now both my husband and my cat are giving me the silent treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 732

You deserved it 2 436

Scoville scale

By firefire - 30/07/2020 08:01

Today, since my husband has been volunteering to do more of the cooking, I was happy and relieved to have help, until every meal he made had an ungodly amount of spices in it. I overheard him on the phone, saying he’s been purposely making my food inedibly hot so that I’ll eat less and lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 971

You deserved it 294

By cat whisperer - 20/03/2014 04:31 - United States

Today, on my way to Burger King I got into a heated discussion with my wife about our cats. We have 15 rescues, and I've reached my limit. Guess what came running up to my car while waiting in the drive-through. We named him Pickles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 947

You deserved it 10 676

By WaffleJesus - 07/10/2015 08:29 - United States

Today, my husband is sulking because I wouldn't let him do what he's always wanted to do: throw our cat out the second floor window to see if she would land safely and on all fours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 317

You deserved it 2 561

xShannonxSammyx 7

Thursday 28 July 2011 16:24

So... FML I don't have any more spices, or FML my husband can't remember our dead cat's name?

RebornProblem 0

Thursday 28 July 2011 16:24

Was he high the entire lifetime of your cat?

Comments

spazx 5

Thursday 28 July 2011 20:11

awww i find that cute

LowLives 9

Thursday 28 July 2011 20:20

Oh no! I hope he doesn't throw out all your knives now.

kaykay20 0

Thursday 28 July 2011 20:58

Why didn't he just put them in a drawer or cupboard instead of wasting it all?

yellowboy30 0

Thursday 28 July 2011 21:06

divorce

FahKinSuhPah 4

Thursday 28 July 2011 21:07

Do you have a lisp?

justanotherbird 19

Thursday 28 July 2011 21:18

Hopefully he didn't throw out the Melange too!

glittercookies 12

Thursday 28 July 2011 21:57

why throw out food? he could have just not opened up the spice cabinet. all the cooking will be bland.

Inspired22 11

Thursday 28 July 2011 23:58

Oh man, that sucks! Spices are expensive! Not to mention your husband's behavior...hope everything is okay!

s24sammy 8

Friday 29 July 2011 0:54

How in the entire life of your cat did he not know its name?

likerawrandstuff 0

Friday 29 July 2011 1:08

I Think They Are Both Potheads XD Im Cool with That.

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The Top

Today, while I was showering, someone left a note on the bathroom door that read, "We can all hear you masturbating. Shut the hell up." I don't know what's more embarrassing, that everyone in my house thought I was masturbating or that I was actually singing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 052

You deserved it 372

Today, I set aside a weekend to spend time with a friend. I learned that someone else is staying there: a fat, unemployed man-child who talks shit about us on Facebook, while his manipulative wife pays his bills. He got evicted from his last home when he pretended to be a ninja and cut up his neighbor's garden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 68

The Top

Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 901

You deserved it 19 532

Today, at work, I was told I was a failure. Feeling like crap, I went to my best friend to see if he could make me laugh. He told me that he felt obligated to hang out with me, so he thought that we shouldn't anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 677

You deserved it 3 372

Today, I got a call from a former client. After migrating his firm to cloud-based apps a few months back, he decided I was too expensive, and he'd manage things himself. He called today with "a couple of quick questions." Question 1: How does he log in to make changes? FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 101

Today, during my second day as a receptionist, every time the phone rang I jumped in shock. My co-workers now already think I'm weird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 619

You deserved it 27 995

Today, I was so sleep deprived that when a customer held their hand out to get their receipt, I slapped it without thinking about it. Great way to start 2024. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 308

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 723

You deserved it 13 564