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Awwwww. I struggle with weight issues too, so I feel for you, but that is not cool of your husband. Tons of people are gonna be on here telling you to " divorce his ass" but don't.

Jokes aside, my advice would be this: Talk to your doctor. See if you are at an acceptable weight, or whether your health is/is going to suffer for your weight. If you are healthy, divorce. Your husband is just a shallow asshole. If you are not or are borderline, try to lose the weight. He has your health in mind when he says those things.

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Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Awwwww. I struggle with weight issues too, so I feel for you, but that is not cool of your husband. Tons of people are gonna be on here telling you to " divorce his ass" but don't.

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She's the one who stopped caring about her health...personally i wouldnt want to be with someone who would be too lazy to stay healthy, because thats going to lead to many more problems down the road...and it also shows off their ethic. Its like "hey im married, so i might as well be lazy and not work so hard to stay healthy and fit". That's the wrong attitude, because she might stop caring about other things easily too

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Pretty much what #114 said. Marriage is a commitment for life, not a commitment for fifteen years followed by an early death from diabetes. My FYI/YDI judgment depends on whether the OP is a sentient sea-cow or a woman who's not supermodel perfect but still in decent shape.

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We actually have no idea how thin she is. Maybe she's not fat, but doesn't have the super thin, fit body he expects. Either way, he's an ass..he can talk to her about staying in shape, but saying I'll leave you otherwise just says that your marriage is all wrong...he obviously doesn't care about her for the right reasons, like her personality, if he's ready to leave.

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True but maybe part of her personality was her work ethic or love of the outdoors, but now shes showing her true colors and being lazy...something that may not be attractive for this guy

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This actually reminds me of a neighbor that used to live next door. Her husband was great looking, in good shape, but she was waaaay overweight, to the point she waddled. They'd had 2-3 kids close together, and the woman was feeling stressed out constantly. Eventually she pushed for a divorce, and 6 months afterward I could barely recognize her because of how much weight she lost. Turns out her husband was the cause of most of her stress, and once that stress was dealt with, she didn't have weight problems anymore. We don't know what the martial situation is with these two, or even what they look like, IRL. There can be a lot of reasons this is happening. Saying YDI for being a fat-ass is pretty pointless.

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What an ignorant idea to perpetuate...the notion that overweight people are lazy, unhealthy, and undeserving of love. I have friends who are overweight and they're grad students/successful professionals/actively working to help others in their communities, some who exercise constantly, some who don't, some in loving relationships, and some in not. Some people just struggle a lot more to stay thin. While for some it comes easily. For me it's not difficult to stay thin, but I don't judge others for being overweight, when their bodies/lifestyles are not mine and thus I don't know what they have to go through to achieve the ideal of thinness. Moreover, someone who is overweight is not necessarily going to encounter more or worse health problems later in life than someone who is thin.

By  bmach

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Agreed entirely, why would he want to stay with someone he's not attracted to? Personality counts and all that I'm sure but if you're ugly with a personality you're a friend not a lover, that's just how it goes

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ya, attraction is vital. but you ignorants douches obviously dont understand the struggle some women have with their weight. maybe she is trying to maintain her weight but is having a hard time. OP, i dont know the details, but if ur already doing everything u can or u dont wanna work out, tell him to get bent.

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Right, and she may be struggling, but I'm sure her husband would be aware of that. So if he is, and he says this, then he is a dick. But otherwise if she isn't struggling, then why shouldn't she exercise? This is assuming that she is overweight, of course. Now to make this a repeated, but funny fml, she should be 8 months pregnant when he says this

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wtf? if he saw tons of "beautiful people" every day (which i doubt, because generally it's the fat, out-of-shape people that need fitness trainers), then he could marry one of them. but he didn't, he chose his wife - and coming home to her shouldn't be a disappointment at all. maybe disappointed in himself for being a huge douchebag.

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i think it is good that he is honest. Now you know it is important to him for you to stay in shape. Many men would just silently be resentful that you are a fatty, and eventually leave you or have an unhappy marriage.

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she could have been fit when they married. If your wife gained 200 pounds, would you put your foot down? I mean, i'm sure that's not the case, but there comes a point where someone's too heavy and maybe she reached it.

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If she's struggling that much, EAT LESS. It's not rocket science. People bitch about not being able to lose weight, and as soon as they stop bitching they shove cheesecake down their throats. Not exactly the type of diet people should be on when they want to lose weight. I had numerous fat friends that tell me they've been trying to lose weight for years with no success. It turned out they eat whenever they're hungry or feel they should eat. I can't even fake surprise when they tell me they can't lose weight. I can't lose weight if I eat like a pig either. It's not the end of the world if you go hungry for a few hours. Yes, it's harder for some people to stay slim, and I think it's perfectly acceptable to be "overweight", but when you venture into the zone of obesity then something is seriously wrong with you, and you're 100% at fault for your fatness. It takes effort to maintain giant sizes like that.

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Completely agree with you. I have fat friends as well that constantly whine about their weight and how they've been trying to lose it over however many years. And yet they say this as they munch on a plate of food big enough for three people. No sympathy from me OP if you just can't be bothered exercising.

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The OP might not even BE fat, as she said "Stay thin", not "get thin". Not to mention the fact that there are lots of different reasons for someone being overweight, other than disorders. It's not always just someone being lazy and taking not taking care of themselves, though I admit that can be the case.

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