Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on...

By teegtwo - 22/07/2014 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 993

You deserved it 26 997

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By KayleeXLoVe21 - 03/11/2011 23:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 909

You deserved it 9 735

Valid reason

By stephhh055 - 21/10/2019 16:00 - United States - Portland

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 468

You deserved it 265

By geewhy - 26/12/2012 21:20 - United States - South Park

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 693

You deserved it 5 433

Miscommunication

By xoxo - 01/04/2020 02:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend won't talk to me because I let a giggle slip during sex and he's convinced I was laughing at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 870

You deserved it 413

By epicsquishii - 01/05/2012 11:02 - United States - Riverbank

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 016

You deserved it 3 466

Pick your moments, dude!

By Anonymous - 11/10/2019 00:01

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 892

You deserved it 333

Honky

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 14:06 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 024

You deserved it 5 032

Wet noodle

By Anonymous - 01/08/2021 14:01

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 558

You deserved it 103

Bad sign

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 848

You deserved it 6 264

Mood ruiner

By RuinedTheMood - 21/09/2014 05:11 - United States - Tomball

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said, "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded, "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 959

You deserved it 13 470

Welshite 39

Tuesday 22 July 2014 15:55

Start wearing masks. Batman is pretty awesome.

Welshite 39

Tuesday 22 July 2014 16:01

No one ever complains about having sex with Batman.

Comments

Imareth 10

Wednesday 23 July 2014 6:26

Hey, at least he's giving you orgasms. Maaany guys can't do that.

lesley3r3 22

Wednesday 23 July 2014 8:27

Blind fold him?

srngirl 8

Wednesday 23 July 2014 16:32

From experience, having sex in the dark is pretty good if you don't see the person. It would feel like a wonderful wet dream.

Cheekiech 12

Thursday 24 July 2014 21:55

Well now he's just going to IMAGINE your ****** face when you're having one, that will make him laugh even more.

AFaye3964 17

Friday 25 July 2014 3:18

practice new facial experission.

TheVurcle 10

Friday 25 July 2014 5:52

Sorry but that's hilarious

lostaf 4

Monday 28 July 2014 3:13

Mine laughs because the bottom half of my body twitches after and he thinks it's hilarious. .

FMLGUY254 1

Friday 8 August 2014 3:52

This is where a poker face would come in handy.

otumboo 10

Monday 11 August 2014 10:01

doggie style I think would help this situation or reverse cow girl

Michael_Scratch 8

Sunday 28 September 2014 20:17

I hope you don't take this the wrong way but you look better with the lights off

Keywords

Gamers Love Video games Gross Weird Health First Dates Smells Technology Parents Kids Annoying Jealousy Animals Dogs AITA Pranks Dreams Family Geek Gun control Relatable Money Amazon Birthday Cute Awkward Abuse Scams Social Media

The Top

Today, my fat brother has nothing wrong with him. His blood pressure, cholesterol, and absolutely everything are perfectly normal, despite him being 10 stone overweight. I'm 12 stone and exercise regularly, yet I have 4 separate serious medical conditions, one of which might one day kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 193

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 266

You deserved it 2 123

The Top

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 875

You deserved it 3 475

Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. Being dumped wasn't the reaction I was expecting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 874

You deserved it 192

Today, I was in my Cosmetic Application class, and we were about to apply foundation to our models. I walk over to my friend and say, "Wow, that foundation is really orange and blotchy." Then the model turns to me and says, "Actually, we haven't started yet… that's just my skin." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 918

You deserved it 58 338

Today, my boyfriend and I went on a picnic. After we finished eating he laid down, closed his eyes, and put his head in my lap. At the exact second that I bent down to kiss him, he jumped up to get the Frisbee. We both have bloody noses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 868

You deserved it 4 394

Today, I was at the supermarket when I saw an elderly lady slip on a wet patch of floor. I ran over to help, and I almost fell too before steadying myself. Then some pimply cockmunch of a teen decided to kick my legs out from under me and walk away while laughing his balls off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 336

You deserved it 2 364

Today, my four year-old son has reached the phase where yelling random words is funny. I can't go five minutes without hearing, "CHICKEN NUGGET!" or "KALAMAZOO!" or "STINKY SOCKS!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 537

You deserved it 236