Work: Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another,... - FML

By shonfyr - 11/03/2014 21:35 - Spain

Today, it was a really slow day at work. One thing lead to another, and soon enough we were all taking turns shoving each other across the office on a swivel chair. Our boss came in during my turn, and I got singled out for a verbal warning. Everyone else got off with a disapproving glare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 031

You deserved it 10 074

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Shut up!

By Anonymous - 03/03/2013 18:03 - Germany - Augsburg

Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 967

You deserved it 11 217

Asshat walking

By Bad employee - 28/06/2023 11:00 - United States

Today, a random customer at work admonished my coworker for being on her phone. During our lunch break. As he walked away, my coworker muttered, "What the fuck is his problem?" I nodded in agreement. He heard her and saw me nodding. As did our boss. Time to get written up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 712

You deserved it 155

By MikeMorin18 - 01/08/2011 00:07 - United States

Today, at work I was talking to a co-worker about what a slacker my manager was, and how all she did was stand around and talk. She was standing behind me the whole time. I now have sore nuts due to a direct hit from a broom handle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 300

You deserved it 35 023

By Anonymous - 28/07/2014 02:48 - United States - Fresno

Today, I watched a manager and a co-worker sit underneath a table in our store all day as I got yelled at for not working hard enough. I was the only one actually working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 539

You deserved it 2 792

By Anonymous - 13/12/2016 15:06 - United States

Today, I was on my way to work and someone cut me off. I then switched lanes and sped past the person as I flipped them off. What I didn't notice was that the person that cut me off was my boss. He's been shooting me dirty looks from across the room all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 989

You deserved it 5 780

By hangman - 01/08/2013 18:25 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 741

You deserved it 4 528

By jalisc512 - 21/08/2014 20:16 - United States - Aurora

Today, my boss threatened to write me up, after I made a slightly rude joke about a coworker everyone hates. A while later, a colleague told me the same joke. Turns out my boss had gone around telling it to everyone else and taking all the credit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 430

You deserved it 5 516

By helpme - 04/12/2013 04:05 - United States - Brockton

Today, I got a new chair at work. After spending 3 hours putting it together, I was called into my boss's office and let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 565

You deserved it 5 723

By NotJobbing - 11/08/2015 23:05 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my lazy bastard of a co-worker punched me straight in the jaw because he didn't get the promotion I did. Being his new manager, I fired him. A few hours later, I was fired for "abusing" my power. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 430

You deserved it 3 147

By tortured - 27/11/2013 03:11 - United States

Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 248

You deserved it 4 580

Next

Top comments

Meraki 19

Wednesday 12 March 2014 1:33

"One thing lead to another," ... I was expecting something sexual after that and facepalmed.

iLike2Teabag 27

Wednesday 12 March 2014 1:36

I was expecting an FML about hooking up with coworkers when I first read this...

Comments

Coryj1220 15

Friday 14 March 2014 12:11

Just have your little brother convince them to tell the truth. Don't worry, B's got this.

kittie77 10

Monday 17 March 2014 4:35

Lmao, was your turn fun? XD

carbonbasedcynic 17

Wednesday 20 January 2016 21:41

how is this fml worthy

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 684

You deserved it 11 188

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 1 708

The Top

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 887

You deserved it 6 630

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 914

You deserved it 27 398

Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 184

You deserved it 2 495

Today, I had to convince my 20-year-old boyfriend that not only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-blooded and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 964

You deserved it 4 805

Today, my wife paid a man with a fake crystal and an even faker accent to investigate the creakiness of our apartment complex floors. $300 later, she told me he'd found a "sinkhole of chi energy" and that the building may collapse if we don't pay him to disperse it. I want a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 713

You deserved it 3 431

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 105