Love: Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms...

By Starchyld - 11/11/2009 12:21 - Canada

Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like eachother. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says: "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 924

You deserved it 4 134

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/01/2012 05:32 - United States

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 359

You deserved it 2 625

By bregaja - 25/02/2016 18:59 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his mom for the very first time. After shaking my hand and looking me up and down, she loudly proclaimed, "She doesn't have the right hips to have kids." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 848

You deserved it 1 622

By fridgemylifee - 13/08/2015 17:39 - United States

Today, I had a first date with a guy I met online. And his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 473

You deserved it 2 984

By anonymous - 24/10/2010 16:14 - United States

Today, I went on a movie date with a guy. He brought his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 633

You deserved it 4 075

By Anonymous - 14/06/2016 02:39 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, on a first date, he told me I look like his ex's mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 235

You deserved it 949

Been there, done that

By Anonymous - 05/08/2014 02:00 - United States - New Ulm

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 862

You deserved it 4 614

Bat out of hell

By goodeyesight - 11/10/2012 14:02 - Brazil - Sào Paulo

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 355

You deserved it 31 722

Classic

By KDH - 26/01/2024 09:00 - United States - Santa Monica

Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 107

Mammy's boy

By Anonymous - 14/04/2023 22:00

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 880

You deserved it 155

By Tiffosaur - 04/01/2013 06:12 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 996

You deserved it 2 645

Raiderwrstler65 0

Wednesday 11 November 2009 16:08

lol you must be a good selection for him to plant his seed

chloelove210 0

Wednesday 11 November 2009 16:07

OMG thats soooo awkward! runnnnnn!!!!!!!

Comments

hassenpfeffermmm 0

Wednesday 28 April 2010 6:51

at least he understands anatomy!! He knows your boobs are for your young, not implants.

Allielovespanda 0

Tuesday 15 June 2010 7:15

you obviously don't know what it means to have baby makin hips :) majority of guys think curvy women are sexy. lighten up guuuurl.

rawrkittehpwnage 0

Friday 2 July 2010 0:31

o.o

ItsmeRJ_ 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 18:52

You should say and my mom was right: You do have a creepers mouth!

YoungBanks 3

Sunday 24 April 2011 4:21

the guy you went out with I'll take a guess and say a redneck incest hick "you got good breedin' hips"

ashley1357 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 6:37

that's kinda gross

skeleton_skinner 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 9:06

and you're mad why? be flattered. he didn't call you fat or some shit

ashhxoxo 14

Monday 11 July 2011 6:57

what does he think you are, a dog? poor babyy. that sucks

thatviolinplayer 0

Friday 22 July 2011 14:48

thats really creepy

npb123 0

Sunday 16 October 2011 19:46

Well that's awkward!!

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The Top

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 018

You deserved it 3 408

Today, while I was showering, someone left a note on the bathroom door that read, "We can all hear you masturbating. Shut the hell up." I don't know what's more embarrassing, that everyone in my house thought I was masturbating or that I was actually singing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 053

You deserved it 372

The Top

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 459

You deserved it 72 608

Today, since my most recent breakup, I haven’t had sex in almost a year but I’m too afraid to just jump on Tinder for a hookup, because I had to move back into my parents' spare room, and I can’t be bringing a woman back for sex on a fold-out futon with mom and dad in the next bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 395

Today, the mentally-challenged teen who sometimes comes into my restaurant gave me a hug as usual. I thought it was sweet, until a coworker let me know he immediately goes and jacks off in the bathroom after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 994

You deserved it 1 633

Today, I went on my first date in seven months. We hit it off really well, having a lot of things in common. The only thing we don't have in common is a tan line from a wedding ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 419

You deserved it 1 170

Today, I went to my best friend's birthday party. After about 15 minutes, I noticed a girl, possibly one of his sister's friends, wearing the same shirt as me. I'm a 23 year-old bloke. She didn't look a day over 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 138

You deserved it 9 726

Today, a guy in my class was talking about himself. He started his story with, "When I was little, I was a ginger." I replied without thinking, "Is that why you got put up for adoption?" Him being adopted was the actual story he wanted to tell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 119

You deserved it 47 060