Love: Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks,...

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 524

You deserved it 3 188

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Same thing different taste

By ThisIsWhyIStayAtHome - 24/05/2014 00:09 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 315

You deserved it 3 401

By lehonj49 - 21/06/2013 16:10 - Australia - Burwood

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 845

You deserved it 3 655

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 02:02 - United Kingdom

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 835

You deserved it 4 731

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 187

You deserved it 21 603

By Anonymous - 02/02/2013 23:03 - Belgium - Schepdaal

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 267

You deserved it 3 771

By lonelyboy101 - 27/08/2009 00:37 - United States

Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, so I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 896

You deserved it 8 612

By Anonymous - 19/08/2009 22:31 - Canada

Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 105

You deserved it 4 706

By hateskool888581 - 12/01/2010 00:28 - Mexico

Today, I went to a nearby nightclub with some friends and the girl I've been flirting for weeks. We were having a good time until this girl and two of her friends got back complaining about some "drunk-old-perverts harassing them". It looks like my dad and his friends are having a good time too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 914

You deserved it 2 347

By I Tried - 29/01/2016 22:18 - United States - Burton

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 448

You deserved it 3 639

By Med - 13/11/2012 12:02 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 778

You deserved it 2 972

gc327072 30

Saturday 8 December 2012 5:30

Whoa, badass girlfriend! Dealing justice one bitch-whipping at a time! Better not piss her off, OP, your balls would get kicked so hard they'd turn into diamonds. But hey, congrats on having a loyal girlfriend!

SquishFish 15

Saturday 8 December 2012 5:30

Hey, least she didn't take it wrong and think you were cheating on her!

Comments

MarkQ995 4

Saturday 8 December 2012 12:35

This sounds more like a win than a fml moment.

xrudeboyrock 29

Saturday 8 December 2012 13:18

Am I the only one who doesn't think the girlfriend is 'awesome?' If someone was hitting on me and my boyfriend went right to kicking their ass, I would be embarrassed. Saying "hey, buddy, she's with me," and walking me away would be enough.

Dracoboxer357 35

Saturday 8 December 2012 14:27

74- I'm with you as far as not dealing out a full tilt shit-kicking for simply hitting on my wife, but Op said Mary Meth Mouth was actually Groping him. And anyone that wants to put their hands on my wife's body after being given a solid "No" deserves to have me bust my foot off in his ass.....IMHO of course. ;)

_wraith 15

Saturday 8 December 2012 15:12

#78 - I came here to say the exact same thing. It's one thing to overreact because somebody looked at you, but if the situation can't be diffused with words and the person is overstepping that boundary... well, I WOULD expect my fiance to step in at that point. The girl was GROPING him; guarantee he's already told her to leave him alone, in which case she chose to ignore that request. I would have done the exact same thing.