Love, Cars, Divorce and Money: Today, I was on my way to work when my ex-wife drove past me... - FML

By DD: - 19/02/2015 20:45 - United States - Denver

Today, I was on my way to work when my ex-wife drove past me in the car she got from me. She fucked me over so hard in the divorce that I have to ride my bike to work while wearing a full suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 154

You deserved it 3 946

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By an unlucky man - 05/08/2016 09:37 - United States - Simi Valley

Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 986

You deserved it 3 098

By Aerostar - 16/06/2009 04:35 - United States

Today, we had our divorce hearing and now it is final. As we were leaving the courthouse, I told my ex-wife how happy I was that we were finally free from each other. Then my junky old van wouldn't start and I had to beg her for a ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 200

You deserved it 69 516

By ViviMage - 11/06/2019 02:00

Today, I was nearly T-Boned at a stop sign by my ex-roommate. I moved 10 miles away to get away from her after her midlife crisis, and her losing the house, and now avoid her end of town. She now works outside my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 751

You deserved it 131

By Anonymous - 17/10/2015 23:30 - United States - Trenton

Today, I walked from my friend's wedding to my divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 287

You deserved it 2 192

Rekt

By Shaun - 16/06/2009 02:13 - United States

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 353

You deserved it 6 163

By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 05:37 - United States - Mariposa

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 719

You deserved it 3 449

By dust - 27/01/2012 06:54 - Japan

Today, I found out that due to the fact that I got divorced, the insurance for my car is going up. A year after she took everything, she is still costing me money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 998

You deserved it 3 336

By Anonymous - 06/12/2015 09:58 - United States - Asheville

Today, at work, my vindictive, cheating ex made me clean and inspect her new wedding ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 278

You deserved it 2 208

BIKES!

By cwell88 - 21/06/2015 13:29

Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 764

You deserved it 1 776

The cost of friendship

By Anonymous - 03/08/2022 12:00

Today, my wife found out about all the crazy stuff my ex and I used to do in my car, which I still drive. Serves me right for encouraging them to be friends. I hope she doesn’t find out about what went down on our ottoman, I can’t afford a new one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 1 440

Next

Top comments

thawny_fml 21

Friday 20 February 2015 0:09

Just keep pedalling.

Pleonasm 35

Friday 20 February 2015 0:25

At least she didn't leave you only with half; imagine riding a unicycle to work!

Comments

Culito97 10

Friday 20 February 2015 7:11

Atleast you're getting an exercise..

poirot_fml 13

Friday 20 February 2015 7:59

That's why I don't understand the divorce in America!

SydLovesLacey 18

Friday 20 February 2015 8:31

At least you're getting exercise.

ConstantlyAnna 8

Friday 20 February 2015 9:11

Maybe you'll be ****** over hard by your next wife. But for all the right reasons, if you know what I'm sayin'! ;)

shelle112 10

Friday 20 February 2015 9:22

Ouch bro, at least it's not Saturday yet! No snow yet!

danm_1 28

Friday 20 February 2015 15:00

Well at least you don't have to worry about being stuck in traffic, so you've got that going for you which is nice...

why57why 21

Friday 20 February 2015 15:02

At least you have the suit

OhhLookItsLarry 7

Friday 20 February 2015 16:45

Shoulda got a prenup

Jack_Me_Off_Jerk 5

Friday 20 February 2015 16:49

Must be California

ThatAmericanGirl 5

Friday 20 February 2015 18:53

You cheat?

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The Top

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 683

You deserved it 7 123

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 1 709

The Top

Today, I took my driving test. I was nervous, but I thought I followed the rules of the road pretty well. My tester ended up failing me for "backing out too slowly". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 240

You deserved it 299

Today, I had to tell my teenage son that no, his knowledge of the English language was not passed down to him genetically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 593

You deserved it 3 855

Today, I was taking a shower when I seized, tripped over the edge of the tub, and broke my nose by slamming my face in the open toilet. Thank you, epilepsy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 838

You deserved it 181

Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 439

You deserved it 108 466

Today, I was driving through my neighborhood when I heard a siren. I looked into my rear view mirror and saw a motorcycle, so I pulled over. The motorcycle drove by, and it turned out to be an old lady with a leather jacket. The siren was in a song on the radio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 524

You deserved it 28 325

Today, the only thing my downstairs neighbor wanted to talk about with me is how she can hear us go to the bathroom. She also claims that she can tell which one of us is going, based on the noise level. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 883

You deserved it 2 368