Intimacy: Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was...

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 23:02 - United States - Rocky Point

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 942

You deserved it 5 649

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

Bummed out

By Anon - 11/11/2023 04:00

Today, I tried to tease my boyfriend by pulling my skirt up, bending over, and backing up into him. He gagged and said, "Please, wash your ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 699

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 385

You deserved it 4 615

Observation

By Anonymous - 17/04/2009 05:43 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 97 733

You deserved it 7 998

A load of hot air

By SkipBeatOtaku - 16/05/2020 20:00

Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 713

You deserved it 698

To each his own

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 14:00

Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 224

Close but no BJ

By nikkrissa_04 - 07/08/2009 11:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 657

You deserved it 12 195

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 285

You deserved it 2 747

Mr Clean

By Anonymous - 18/01/2013 10:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 244

You deserved it 7 592

Woof woof

By kjdhfakjs - 20/05/2010 18:32 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 417

You deserved it 6 699

By Anonymous - 13/09/2012 05:30 - Canada - Campbell River

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 142

You deserved it 5 389

ClassyCommando 13

Monday 1 October 2012 9:02

It's an asshole, what the **** does he expect it to look like? If he cares that much about bleaching assholes, he should bleach himself for being one.

shadowsorel 15

Monday 1 October 2012 9:02

How the **** do you bleach an asshole?

Comments

baileymarie102 6

Thursday 4 October 2012 2:45

Lmfao what?? What does he expect!?

chockelvis 3

Thursday 11 October 2012 20:13

I just spit out my tea laughing at this comment haha

wtfmeesh 4

Thursday 18 October 2012 10:43

Page

allybeauregard27 0

Tuesday 23 October 2012 4:14

do y'all have sex with all the lights on?

allybeauregard27 0

Tuesday 23 October 2012 4:16

next time y'all are having sex wait till he gets close and say "babe you really need to bleach your entire ass"

jiggins007 4

Wednesday 28 November 2012 6:26

"So I should bleach you, asshole."

TheMystery13 13

Wednesday 16 January 2013 6:48

So what are you waiting for? Have him bleached!

TheImaginarySong 16

Sunday 6 October 2013 4:48

Do people really bleach their butt hole? Because that sounds unhealthy

marijuflowers 6

Wednesday 18 June 2014 9:07

Wow such drama here. To OP: I think you should highlight to your boyfriend that he isn't exactly a **** star either.... Maybe you would like it if he enlarged what's in his pants, I mean if this is all about wanting the **** star look.. Right?? Seriously think you need a new partner.