Mr Clean

By Anonymous - 18/01/2013 10:50 - United States

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks 66 243
You deserved it 7 592

Same thing different taste

Top comments

When they talked about this in Charmin commercials, I never believed them. Learn something new every day.

He was probably too wiped out to notice the extra toilet paper. I know it stinks, but it happens. Maybe next time you should just disregard it and stop being so anal.

Comments

When they talked about this in Charmin commercials, I never believed them. Learn something new every day.

Your boyfriend is a adorable bear. What's wrong with that? I thought girls love that.

rogerdodgeroz 4

That's shit for op , think she learnt a lesson in bday hygiene hey

Jessj958 19

Yes, commercials are always right, don't you know that? :)

Woah woah wait charmin commercials contain sex?! I gotta start paying better attention to commercials apparently.

oj101 33

That's why I use wet wipes. Toilet paper breaks, it's rough, leaves a smell behind, and doesn't clean as well as wipes do.

#107, Mama Bear was trying to be discrete. She was really talking to Papa Bear;)

#112 but at least it doesn't clog up the toilet all the time like you probably do

Well i WAS going to go have some chili.. But you know D:

Pardon me, I don't believe such inappropriate language is necessary at this time. Try again later.

Your right nobody asked..thank you for taking time out of your day to point that out :)

venom1576 3

You're like 11 why are you on FML?

At least he attempts to wipe, you gotta give him some credit. And some better toilet paper might be nice too.

Maybe he was saving it for next time he runs out of TP. I hate it when I go take a dump and there is none left. It's like being stranded on a deserted island.

Or maybe he was stopping anal leakage. Either way, he should've removed it pre coital. Its like the equivalent of a guy going to finger a girl, then discovering she's been wearing a tampon. >_

Jessj958 19

I hope most girls would be classy enough to say "Hey I'm wearing a tampon, don't go there" before it ever got to that point.

RedPillSucks 31

In the heat of the moment, somethings are left unsaid. "I'm on my period", "I'm not on the pill", "I'm using a tampon", "My husband is in the next room" are just a few.

HairyPunisher 27

3, I don't think the quality of the toilet paper is responsible for a "clump" being there. That's simply hygienic negligence on OP's boyfriend's part.

XDsmileyDX_fml 24

I bet that killed the mood real fast...

Definitely not, nothing turns me on more than a girl wrapped in toilet paper.

18- come on dude, what the hell is up with that? If you gonna have a fetish, make it a good one, like a girl wrapped on used toilet paper, none of that new shit :)

XDsmileyDX_fml 24

Got it in Key West, Florida! :3 Unfortunately my dog scratched part of the face off so now it looks dumb. :(

@49 it depends on the girl. If I want to just get a quick bang out of a woman, new toilet paper is fine, but if I want to make sweet love, used toilet paper is the most sensual of all.

porcupineattack1 5

"That's shitty" (Had to be done) "This is a hole new level of disgusting" "I was going to crack a joke about this, butt I don't want to be a basTurd." "That"s not very Charmin' of him" I'm on a toilet Roll

Then there's a farfetched one: There was a **** like that that I wanted to watch, but it was Pa-Per-Poo.

RedPillSucks 31

The toilet paper had her rapt.

You'd think after grabbing the toilet paper, nothing would be inserted.

He strategically placed it there for this very moment. What a clever idea!

He was probably too wiped out to notice the extra toilet paper. I know it stinks, but it happens. Maybe next time you should just disregard it and stop being so anal.

68, I'm pretty sure it's pronounced toushay? I could be wrong...

SApprentice 34

74- It is, but 68 meant that as a joke. You know, "tushy", as in "butt", in a response to 11's series of puns.

PandaKitteh 20

I agree. As we all know, shit happens.

VIPwhenever 15

It's pronounced toosh but people usually say toushay.

No - the accent on the E makes it an ay sound. It's tooshay. Except in this case where a pun was intended :P