Health: Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw...

By ticked - 06/10/2009 13:01 - Pakistan

Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 554

You deserved it 47 982

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

Yucky!

By theapplesleader - 23/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Washington

Today, I picked my dog up and nibbled her ear. On the tip of her ear was a large tick, which burst, sending blood into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 566

You deserved it 3 812

By goodmorning - 07/09/2014 13:45 - United States - Nashville

Today, I was eating a bowl of cereal and noticed something float to the top. On closer inspection, it turned out to be a mouse turd. I had already eaten half the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 690

You deserved it 4 455

Unfortunate

By Anonymous - 16/01/2021 08:01

Today, I was eating a bag of chips when one of the pieces broke off into a sharp point and when I chewed it, it stabbed into my gums. When I got up to wash the blood out of my mouth, I hit my big toe on my desk corner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 912

You deserved it 135

Added spice

By hungry - 06/04/2009 03:19 - United States

Today, I was hungry and decided to nibble on some Cheez-Its I had in my room. After I'd enjoyed some of them, I looked into the box to see how many I had left, where I noticed a lot of little black moving dots. Apparently I wasn't the only one enjoying the crackers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 560

You deserved it 16 936

Spice

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 956

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 18:51 - Mayotte - Mamoudzou

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 276

You deserved it 3 661

By Anonymous - 10/02/2016 18:36 - United States - Milford

Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 318

You deserved it 1 995

By Anonymous - 04/08/2016 21:25

Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 995

You deserved it 15 564

By dumbblonde - 06/08/2009 03:04 - United States

Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 273

You deserved it 62 319

Hello little dude

By Anonymous - 19/05/2012 22:54 - United States

Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 567

You deserved it 2 861

Intoxicunt 5

Tuesday 6 October 2009 19:52

Were you eating black chips? I think FML has taught me to never pick up "food" I dropped and eat it. Also, nice username.

chcagr 1

Tuesday 6 October 2009 20:19

Once upon a time I was eating pizza while watching television. Out of the corner of my eye I see one lonely piece of sausage left in the box. I pick it up and eat it, of course I don't bother to look at it. It was a stink bug. It turns out that they don't just stink, they taste BAD as well. You can't just spit out the taste of a stink bug. Oh well, live and learn.

Comments

melisabeth86 0

Monday 14 March 2011 9:08

I think it's funny that Simone replied that, "they have done that too"!!! ewww!! lol

69_jackson_69 0

Sunday 27 March 2011 16:13

A "packet" of chips? YDI partly just for that.

mwahaha1 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 13:23

uhhhh do you by any chance have a bunch of trees in your house or wut? i find it hard to believe that a tick just randomly crawls into your house amd chills on ur table and ppl, ticks arent always black, they can be normal dog tick (brown) and paraltsis (greyish) and lots more but on the fml, its kinda stupid