Work: Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours...

By DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE - 22/11/2012 21:03 - United States - Schertz

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 782

You deserved it 1 962

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Same thing different taste

By StupidNurse - 26/01/2012 21:57 - Germany

Today, I cut my finger with a knife while cooking. I work in a hospital and have to use hand disinfectant at least every twenty minutes. It hurts badly. I have to work for eight hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 749

You deserved it 4 235

Triage

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 14:01

Today, while at my job as a nurse in the ER, someone came in with a hangnail. They threw a fit that they had to wait because we were managing a heart attack, a man with colon cancer and a kid with appendicitis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 814

You deserved it 106

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 15:16 - United States - Jasper

Today, I finally finished a gruelling shift at the hospital. I hadn't slept in over 30 hours, so I was happy to get out. I was quickly rushed back in after I collapsed in the parking lot and cracked my head open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 572

You deserved it 1 157

By Anonymous - 28/10/2009 08:03 - United States

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 175

You deserved it 7 936

MVP

By Darren - 31/08/2020 04:01 - Australia - Greenacre

Today, during my second shift back at work after missing four weeks for knee surgery, I stabbed myself in the hand and now need three weeks off for that surgery. Just as I'm up for a promotion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 512

You deserved it 326

911 please

By hurts - 04/05/2009 18:48 - Canada

Today, I was helping my friend wash dishes. As I went to grab some tongs to dry them, I impaled my forearm on a knife that was sticking blade up. My friend wanted to finish the dishes before taking me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 664

You deserved it 4 993

Help!

By Krissy - 01/04/2021 19:59

Today, at work on the front desk at a dental office, there was a massive system glitch. I'm now currently recreating appointments for around 300 patients, on top of checking out the patients that are currently in today from their appointments. FML

I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 62

By Bandgeek - 16/03/2017 20:00

Today, at work, 5 minutes after I'd sent my help home, we got an 83 dollar order. I'm the only cook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 954

You deserved it 778

Make it stop

By Dr No - 08/07/2022 01:00 - United States - Monterey Park

Today, I work at a medical practice with over 30,000 Patients. Due to staff sickness and vacations, we only have 50 appointments available. I work on the phones, taking appointments. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 100

By Sarah - 07/05/2009 04:53 - United States

Today, my manager bailed on me during the afternoon rush; swamped and distracted, I cut off the pad of my thumb in a cheese slicer. Some clinic hours later I returned, hungry and sick with blood loss, to sign WC papers. Manager's only words: "You're staying late to cover your long break, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 878

You deserved it 3 034

SweetAsHell 9

Friday 23 November 2012 2:57

Someone had two forks in them?? Did they try to get one out with another?

gonad_gobbler 1

Friday 23 November 2012 2:58

I was going to take a stab at a pun, but I was afraid my joke just wasn't going to cut it.

Comments

t765234 10

Friday 23 November 2012 4:32

I want to know which retard tried to pry one fork out with another.

yeti37 16

Friday 23 November 2012 16:54

Ricky Bobby...

jemmers 13

Friday 23 November 2012 4:38

Doc, please write about this on your blog.

DocBastard 38

Friday 23 November 2012 6:01

If it were my patients, I would. Alas, it's not mine.

DinosaurTacoTime 18

Friday 23 November 2012 4:39

Hm. 3 hours, 4 people, and 5 forks? What will be the 6th thing?

ohSNAPyall 26

Friday 23 November 2012 4:43

6 turkeys a-laying

DKjazz 20

Friday 23 November 2012 7:53

7 IQ points total.

tsent8 15

Friday 23 November 2012 21:04

8 inbred retards

ohSNAPyall 26

Friday 23 November 2012 4:40

At least you didn't encounter any electric carving knives.

SquishFish 15

Friday 23 November 2012 6:14

I love your picture! xP mind saying where it's from? :)

btstig 11

Friday 23 November 2012 9:39

Looks like South Park.

B5B0N35 18

Friday 23 November 2012 4:52

people these days jk i cut my finger while cutting the turkey

JustAGirlOnFML 11

Friday 23 November 2012 5:20

What did you pull the carving forks out of? Hands? Butt? Face? Penis? Etc, Please tell.

MistressCaitlyn 7

Friday 23 November 2012 5:20

This makes me think of my sister, and how she used to say "Stick a fork in me, I'm done." when she'd eaten enough. Think there's any chance one of the incidents was related to a stupid comment like that?