Work: Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours...

By DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE - 22/11/2012 21:03 - United States - Schertz

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 781

You deserved it 1 962

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
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Same thing different taste

By StupidNurse - 26/01/2012 21:57 - Germany

Today, I cut my finger with a knife while cooking. I work in a hospital and have to use hand disinfectant at least every twenty minutes. It hurts badly. I have to work for eight hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 749

You deserved it 4 235

Triage

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 14:01

Today, while at my job as a nurse in the ER, someone came in with a hangnail. They threw a fit that they had to wait because we were managing a heart attack, a man with colon cancer and a kid with appendicitis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 813

You deserved it 106

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 15:16 - United States - Jasper

Today, I finally finished a gruelling shift at the hospital. I hadn't slept in over 30 hours, so I was happy to get out. I was quickly rushed back in after I collapsed in the parking lot and cracked my head open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 571

You deserved it 1 157

By Anonymous - 28/10/2009 08:03 - United States

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 173

You deserved it 7 936

MVP

By Darren - 31/08/2020 04:01 - Australia - Greenacre

Today, during my second shift back at work after missing four weeks for knee surgery, I stabbed myself in the hand and now need three weeks off for that surgery. Just as I'm up for a promotion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 511

You deserved it 325

911 please

By hurts - 04/05/2009 18:48 - Canada

Today, I was helping my friend wash dishes. As I went to grab some tongs to dry them, I impaled my forearm on a knife that was sticking blade up. My friend wanted to finish the dishes before taking me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 663

You deserved it 4 991

Help!

By Krissy - 01/04/2021 19:59

Today, at work on the front desk at a dental office, there was a massive system glitch. I'm now currently recreating appointments for around 300 patients, on top of checking out the patients that are currently in today from their appointments. FML

I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 62

By Bandgeek - 16/03/2017 20:00

Today, at work, 5 minutes after I'd sent my help home, we got an 83 dollar order. I'm the only cook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 954

You deserved it 778

Make it stop

By Dr No - 08/07/2022 01:00 - United States - Monterey Park

Today, I work at a medical practice with over 30,000 Patients. Due to staff sickness and vacations, we only have 50 appointments available. I work on the phones, taking appointments. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 100

By Sarah - 07/05/2009 04:53 - United States

Today, my manager bailed on me during the afternoon rush; swamped and distracted, I cut off the pad of my thumb in a cheese slicer. Some clinic hours later I returned, hungry and sick with blood loss, to sign WC papers. Manager's only words: "You're staying late to cover your long break, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 878

You deserved it 3 034

SweetAsHell 9

Friday 23 November 2012 2:57

Someone had two forks in them?? Did they try to get one out with another?

gonad_gobbler 1

Friday 23 November 2012 2:58

I was going to take a stab at a pun, but I was afraid my joke just wasn't going to cut it.

Comments

patrickalamo 47

Friday 23 November 2012 3:02

Tia the season, happy shanks-giving

Udderboy 4

Friday 23 November 2012 3:05

This wouldn't be too bad, but who knows where the knives were located

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

Friday 23 November 2012 3:07

Goodness Gracious do these people Not know how to Cut a Turkey?

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Friday 23 November 2012 3:18

What's With the Random capitalization, #16? :P

FML_Whale 18

Friday 23 November 2012 5:38

She's writing a book. That's the title.

teresee 8

Friday 23 November 2012 3:07

Five forks .... And four people... Huh. Someone had an exciting night.

olpally 32

Friday 23 November 2012 3:08

Love the username op. lmao! Try to take off on christmas eve and Christmas. It could turn into a bloodbath.

Trisha_aus 15

Friday 23 November 2012 3:43

It's DocBastard's twin!

BlowinChronic 18

Friday 23 November 2012 3:08

And this is why I have absolutely no faith in humanity. "Hey y'all, hold my beer and watch as I eat this here carving fork!"

btstig 11

Friday 23 November 2012 9:28

How did it automatically become a dumb southern stereotype? Swag, Yolo, real talk son!!

Feedmyaddiction5 14

Friday 23 November 2012 3:08

'Merica

la_puta_madre 4

Friday 23 November 2012 3:14

Excuse me. I have to inform you that the correct term is 'MUrica.

j_cat187 19

Friday 23 November 2012 4:03

America... America... America, **** YEAH! Coming again, to save the mother ******* day yeah, America, **** YEAH! Freedom is the only way yeah, Terrorist your game is through cause now you have to answer too, America, **** YEAH! So lick my butt, and suck on my balls, America, **** YEAH! What you going to do when we come for you now, it’s the dream that we all share; it’s the hope for tomorrow **** YEAH! McDonalds, **** YEAH! Wal-Mart, **** YEAH! The Gap, **** YEAH! Baseball, **** YEAH! NFL, ****, YEAH! Rock and roll, **** YEAH! The Internet, **** YEAH! Slavery, **** YEAH! **** YEAH! Starbucks, **** YEAH! Disney world, **** YEAH! Porno, **** YEAH! Valium, **** YEAH! Reeboks, **** YEAH! Fake ****, **** YEAH! Sushi, **** YEAH! Taco Bell, **** YEAH! Rodeos, **** YEAH! Bed bath and beyond (**** yeah, **** yeah) Liberty, **** YEAH! White Slips, **** YEAH! The Alamo, **** YEAH! Band-aids, **** YEAH! Las Vegas, **** YEAH! Christmas, **** YEAH! Immigrants, **** YEAH! Popeye, **** YEAH! Democrats, **** YEAH! Republicans (republicans) (**** yeah, **** yeah) Sportsmanship Books. - Team America ( it was needed).