Miscellaneous: Today, I unclogged a toilet. With my hand. For the second time...

By handyjon - 01/03/2011 03:00 - United States

Today, I unclogged a toilet. With my hand. For the second time this week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 887

You deserved it 16 841

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Nice mental image

By Maggie - 17/03/2020 17:00

Today, I had no choice but to unclog a toilet with my bare hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 633

You deserved it 325

Not all heroes…

By pooped - 12/04/2020 23:00

Today, at work, the only toilet in the building was so clogged that it was overflowing. We didn't have a plunger, so basically the only way to stop it was to try and reach in and remove the blockage. I was nominated to do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 871

You deserved it 170

By Alisterine - 24/08/2014 17:31 - United States - Chesterfield

Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 219

You deserved it 14 620

By Anonymous - 19/05/2011 03:48 - United States

Today, for the first time all month I felt truly proud and accomplished. I finally figured out how to change the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 881

You deserved it 24 103

By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 855

You deserved it 11 379

Ain't it funky

By Anonymous - 05/12/2011 00:40 - United States

Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 236

You deserved it 49 160

By Alex - 01/03/2019 16:00

Today, marks three weeks since I started my new dream job. It also marks the second time this week alone that I've clogged the toilet in the restroom. I'm almost 100% sure all my coworkers know it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 979

You deserved it 644

By gmian - 06/12/2015 05:06 - United States - Amherst

Today, at work, I used my foot to flush the toilet, lost my balance, and ended up catching myself with my foot in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 379

You deserved it 11 003

Pig in shit

By Anonymous - 18/10/2021 14:00

Today, after leaving for a two-week-trip, and thinking this time my mom would finally have no choice but to clean the dirty toilet herself for once, because I’ve been doing it the entire year, along with most other chores, I think you can guess what I did first thing upon my return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 138

By neednewshoes - 07/12/2017 01:30

Today, like every day, I flushed a public toilet with my foot. Today, unlike every day, my foot missed the handle and landed in the unflushed water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 434

You deserved it 4 978

lamargus 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 8:57

why? there is something called a plunger!

schwiggidy 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 8:57

try it with yor mouth next time

Comments

JustinThunder 8

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:19

Maybe he wants his hand to smell like shit for a week.

emjay09 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 17:35

he (i'm assuming it's a guy because no girl on earth would do this) should have bought a plunger to fix it the first time.

dreamer1015 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:25

I literally just gagged. Why would you do that?

convictconnie 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:26

get a ******* plunger

iranoutofnames 6

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:43

a fantastic idea!

funktown 2

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:29

lol wat a self induced FML. no sympathy from me my friend.

stayfaded 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:29

EEeeew >.< lol that sucks

iranoutofnames 6

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:31

how many people are willing to bet that OP did this in the first place JUST so he or she can post it up here?

marmots 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:34

Someone needs to take a trip to home hardware...

YayaInLalaLand 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 9:49

Ever heard of a plunger? XD

jennabell 0

Tuesday 1 March 2011 10:00

my dog eats his poop when it doesn't fully digest

rockefoe 6

Tuesday 1 March 2011 10:02

GET A PLUNGER!!!

Keywords

Animals Cats Cute Family Sex Intimacy Awkward Coworkers Work Alcohol Psychology Health Mental health Love AITA Relationship advice Weird Miscellaneous Neighbours Cops Scary Stressed out Parents Birthday Dogs Cake Embarrassing Transportation Cars Cooking

The Top

Today, I got a secondhand message from my mother to not jerk off so much. I know it’s secondhand because my wife says the same thing. They’re in cahoots and lie to one another: mom just wants grandkids, and my wife doesn’t want a smile on my face she didn’t put there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 135

You deserved it 516

Today, right before the most important final of my education, I got a text from my mom saying my house had burned to the ground, and my children were outside waiting for the firemen. I panicked, left school, and sped home… all for her to laugh and tell me it was “just a joke.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 68

The Top

Today, I've come to terms that I'm only living to work. I'm going to be 25, no friends, never had any experience with women. Been trying all year to meet someone, hasn't worked out at all. Dead end job, school did nothing for me. I literally just exist to work, and have no happy memories at all. I give up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 227

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of three years. I worked my ass off planning everything down to a T. It seemed perfect, until I actually proposed, at which point I was rejected and dumped, in front of my family, friends and two coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 305

You deserved it 5 873

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

I agree, your life sucks 52 562

You deserved it 5 755

Today, after years of not meeting my partner's family, along with the new arrival of our daughter, we decided to travel to meet them all and introduce our bundle of joy. Instead of the usual welcoming committee, all they could go on about was whether or not my daughter was his because of how fair toned she is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 113

Today, after faking my orgasms for several years, I found out that my boyfriend has been telling his friends that I'm super loose because he doesn't feel anything when I'm cumming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 685

You deserved it 12 924

Today, while at the store, my fly became undone. It doesn't seem that bad unless an old lady comes to "zip it up for you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 325

You deserved it 4 130