Love: Today, I'm single. Last night, I decided it would be silly to...

By P4ntless - 26/10/2009 22:18 - United States

Today, I'm single. Last night, I decided it would be silly to leave my phone in my car before I went to my roommate's brother's birthday party. Highlights of the evening include: Beer Pong, a keg stand, and breaking up with my girlfriend via text message. I don't remember the last one. She does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 563

You deserved it 41 351

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Reeen - 03/06/2016 22:29 - United States - Pittsboro

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text, right after I finished cleaning his apartment and dropping off a bunch of booze I bought for a big party we were having. It turns out that big party was his "newly single" party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 681

You deserved it 1 234

Sobering.

By Bambusmaster - 13/09/2018 18:50

Today, I'm on vacation with my best friends. We went to a club and I drunk texted my girlfriend of 1 year about how nice everything is and how much I miss her. She responded by breaking up with me because she likes me more as a friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 847

You deserved it 230

By thedudeman14 - 05/11/2014 22:21 - United States - Deer Park

Today, my phone died while I was on the phone with my girlfriend. When I finally got a charger, I saw a text message from her. I'm now single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 442

You deserved it 3 175

By UnfortunatelySingle - 21/07/2015 06:15 - United States - Portland

Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 429

You deserved it 3 377

News to me

By looz - 29/12/2008 07:21 - France

Today, I went out for a drink with my girlfriend. Everything was going smoothly until her phone rang, she took the call and cut whoever it was off quite quickly by saying, "I can't talk right now, I'm in the middle of a break-up." I certainly wasn't aware. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 888

You deserved it 2 147

By Funless - 18/08/2010 16:52 - United States

Today, I was invited to a party, but I didn't attend because my boyfriend would be disappointed with me. Instead, I spent the night with him watching movies. At the end of the night, he broke up with me because I wasn't fun enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 597

You deserved it 7 575

By Clader - 10/12/2008 03:09 - France

Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 612

You deserved it 2 882

By schwange - 15/05/2010 17:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 976

You deserved it 3 884

The old switcheroo

By Anonymous - 21/07/2023 06:00

Today, my fiance's divorce was finalized and we went out to dinner to celebrate. I stepped away to use the bathroom, then came back to a note on the table saying, "I'm going to enjoy single life, thanks!" He left me with the bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 194

You deserved it 525

By whatthewhat? - 25/11/2009 07:57 - United States

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I couldn't trust her after cheating on me with 3 guys. Our friends are sad about it so they're throwing her a pity party. Now I'm single and I have no friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 917

You deserved it 3 537

alicexox 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 1:38

isn't the saying: drunk words are sober thoughts? It's not so bad, you obviously wanted to break up with her anyway right? :)

nando92 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 1:35

haha that sucks... LESSON LEARNED: dont drink so much

Comments

cpatrick820 3

Tuesday 27 October 2009 7:40

who wants candy? btw, don't text drunk asshat

MuseFan288 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 7:59

Now you know not to drink

kisseshugsdrugs 5

Tuesday 27 October 2009 9:13

pick up the phone and check your sent texts. talk to her. if you dont remember it try to figure out what happened..then let us know because im curious haha.

DynamicDave 11

Tuesday 27 October 2009 9:37

I don't understand. Did you take your phone with you because you didn't want to leave it in the car? Or did you leave it ad someone else texted her? Or did you actually text it to her and just don't remember? Help! Is this confusing or am I just dumb?

sprc 1

Tuesday 27 October 2009 10:19

haha what a stupid thing to do, you werent that drunk that you dumped her?

MiniatureMayhem 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 11:52

I thought he left his phone in the car?

teach09 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 12:03

to all the people that are telling the OP to look at his sent text messages: My sent box will only hold 50 or 51 messages, my phone automatically deletes "older" ones as I continue to text. So, perhaps he can't check them. To all the people that are saying "drunken words speak sober thoughts": not always true. I talk to people I CAN NOT STAND when I am drunk. I also feel I need to call the ex that I broke up with when I am drunk. I never think about him sober, except for now as I write this, but whatever. OP: Sometimes it is better to just leave your phone in the car. Hide it somewhere so no one will know that it's in there. And lock your car. Not too hard, I've done it before...

RufusCade 7

Tuesday 27 October 2009 12:23

From drunks and kids you will hear the truth.......

Airch 9

Tuesday 27 October 2009 13:12

Those nights are always the best. Good memories.. or lack of. YDI it for being so drunk, but we all know you're gonna go out and get in the same state next time aswell. Fair play.