Intimacy: Today, I had to grip the headboard of my bed for the first time...

By HeartToFart - 08/07/2014 23:37 - United States - North Port

Today, I had to grip the headboard of my bed for the first time in months. I wasn't having incredible sex unfortunately, just really bad gas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 758

You deserved it 6 724

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/12/2018 14:00

Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 659

You deserved it 2 133

Clenched

By Lovergirl - 01/01/2010 20:23 - United States

Today, I was snuggled in bed with my husband. He thought because my butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky. So he slapped my ass hard in attempt to get something going. I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart because last night I had diarrhea. Apparently I still have it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 787

You deserved it 3 940

By Anonymous - 24/07/2019 20:00

Today, I've had bad gas all day. In bed, almost asleep, I felt the urge to fart, and thinking nothing of it, I let it rip. It wasn't a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 527

You deserved it 430

Multitasking

By Anonymous - 14/11/2012 21:28 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 238

You deserved it 6 803

By Mr Eek - 25/10/2008 16:57

Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 565

You deserved it 12 434

First time?

By Anonymous - 31/07/2021 23:01 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my long-term boyfriend and I went on a romantic getaway. In the hotel we were having great sex, I was so close to… and then he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 309

Just once

By Anonymous - 19/02/2020 20:00

Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 946

You deserved it 191

By LoveStruck- - 10/02/2010 07:29 - United States

Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 784

You deserved it 5 714

By Carla - 12/11/2017 01:30

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night choking and had to open my bedroom window. No, it wasn’t a gas leak. My husband had a curry last night and his constant farting was so bad I was struggling to breathe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 796

You deserved it 433

By oopsie - 01/05/2019 20:00

Today, I got diarrhea. During sex. I didn’t even make it out of the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 959

You deserved it 367

yahoowizard 16

Wednesday 9 July 2014 9:06

At least it's a rare occurrence? The gas, that is.

singer0421 32

Wednesday 9 July 2014 9:08

At least you weren't having both at the same time. Wouldn't be so incredible anymore...

Comments

MandyMeow_fml 18

Wednesday 9 July 2014 10:23

You should look into taking something for that...

JBChristian 47

Wednesday 9 July 2014 11:44

As OP said it was a rare occurrence to even grab the head board, I don't believe taking anything is really that important.

2i1337i2iscore 13

Thursday 10 July 2014 0:25

Derpa derp

aimzskee 30

Wednesday 9 July 2014 10:55

Look on the bright side op, at least it didn't happen while you were having incredible sex.

JBChristian 47

Wednesday 9 July 2014 11:46

It wouldn't have been as much of incredible sex then.

millertime911 15

Wednesday 9 July 2014 10:58

The sex thing would have been so much better!! lol!

wookieewhosshe 28

Wednesday 9 July 2014 13:21

bets on how long OP laughed about the fart?

shizhappenz 11

Wednesday 9 July 2014 15:01

sexy

luckyangel 8

Wednesday 9 July 2014 20:59

Thanks for sharing

Saikon1357 25

Wednesday 9 July 2014 21:36

That reminds me, my home town is finally getting a DelTaco.

katydid91 31

Thursday 10 July 2014 0:02

If your gas pains are that painful or uncomfortable, you might want to go see a doctor about that. Or you could go see FML's own DocBastard!

AoC15 10

Thursday 10 July 2014 3:51

That really blows

harrisoncohix 5

Thursday 10 July 2014 8:25

Did you have to grip it to keep from flying away or something?

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