Today, I've had bad gas all day. In bed, almost asleep, I felt...

By Anonymous - 24/07/2019 20:00

Today, I've had bad gas all day. In bed, almost asleep, I felt the urge to fart, and thinking nothing of it, I let it rip. It wasn't a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 526

You deserved it 430

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Same thing different taste

Classic mistake

By Anonymous - 17/07/2021 15:01 - United States - Fargo

Today, I woke up from a dead sleep needing to fart. The second I tried to push it out, I realized it wasn't wasn't fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 813

You deserved it 447

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 801

You deserved it 35 996

Denial

By Loud - 08/09/2016 06:07 - Australia

Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 595

You deserved it 8 487

By Anonymous - 26/01/2019 11:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 114

You deserved it 383

By anonymous - 08/06/2011 16:47 - United States

Today, while in class, I desperately had to fart. Someone in the room had a coughing fit, so I took that as the chance to let it out. When I was about to release, the coughing stopped. I couldn't stop in time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 632

You deserved it 43 482

Gas giant

By morgan - 09/04/2021 23:00

Today, while laying in bed, I let out a huge fart. I then heard my roommate yell from outside my room, "Did you think you were alone?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 774

You deserved it 284

By Anonymous - 19/07/2014 17:39 - United States - Cape Coral

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 561

You deserved it 41 806

Hear this?

By soundslikeadumbcommentersituation - 11/07/2014 20:34 - Canada - Brampton

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 839

You deserved it 6 930

By That_Indian_Guy - 15/11/2014 13:25 - United States - Oviedo

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 938

You deserved it 9 461

S❤️ed

By andinpublictoo - 29/10/2021 22:59

Today, and for the first time in my life, I was unable to trust a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 224

tiny201002 8

Wednesday 24 July 2019 21:47

You should never trust a fart lol

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 24 July 2019 23:20

Looks like someone shit the bed! I hope you were sleeping alone at the time. Otherwise, you will be for a long time!

Comments

Charlie Given 26

Wednesday 24 July 2019 20:21

😵SHIT HAPPENS as it is said, I feel ur pain have done it several times even once had a fistula pop and absolutely destroyed a mattress and bed set 😭😕

UserDoesExist 13

Wednesday 24 July 2019 20:24

omg lol

tiny201002 8

Wednesday 24 July 2019 21:47

You should never trust a fart lol

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 24 July 2019 23:20

Looks like someone shit the bed! I hope you were sleeping alone at the time. Otherwise, you will be for a long time!

Nikki K 10

Thursday 25 July 2019 3:02

a wise man once told me...never trust a fart.

i8cake 12

Thursday 25 July 2019 4:58

should never trust a fart! especially if it's been happening all day! you were brewing that 💩!

Cowgirl1293 26

Thursday 25 July 2019 8:40

*farts* "Ooooh, that's going to itch when it dries."

PolarBear2020 10

Thursday 25 July 2019 17:42

Aaaah..... rookie mistake

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The Top

Today, I was upset over a recent break up. It showed while I was at work, and I made a customer sad just by looking blue. She complained to my manager. I got written up for being so depressed that I got a customer depressed too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 645

You deserved it 3 615

Today, despite the fact that I'm happy and in love, my spiteful brat of a 12 year-old keeps spreading hateful and disgusting lies about my boyfriend doing unspeakable things while I'm away on business. Her dad told me he's reporting my boyfriend to the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 535

The Top

Today, I realized why I was hired to be a nanny. Apparently the husband had eyes for the last nanny. According to the wife I am not attractive enough to be a threat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 711

You deserved it 3 528

Today, I tried to go to my Hotmail account on my boyfriend's computer. When I typed in "hot", a big history list came down. It was all "Hot single mom looking for a good lay" Craigslist ads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 598

You deserved it 4 136

Today, I walked ten miles to pick up my car from the towing station. Turns out there was enough change for the parking meter in the glovebox after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 909

You deserved it 27 526

Today, both my dad and boyfriend are serious weightlifters, plus my dad boxed in the army, and my boyfriend is a mixed martial artist. Ever since they met, they've been circling each other like bears in the forest trying to work out which is bigger and meaner before the fight even begins. They're both so childish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 050

You deserved it 265

Today, I got a date after being alone for the past 2 years. The girl who my friends set me up with began asking my monthly income, my current occupation, and asked if I have a credit card account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 455

You deserved it 2 034

Today, I went to the beach with friends. While splashing around in the ocean and waving to my friends who were sitting on the sand, I got caught in a strong current and had to be rescued by a lifeguard. They gave me a wristband that said, "Needs Adult Supervision". FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 309