Sex and Intimacy: Today, I had to go with my mom to the gynecologist to translate...

By knowtoomuch - 22/05/2013 00:10 - United States - Aurora

Today, I had to go with my mom to the gynecologist to translate due to her broken English. As we were filling out papers and answering questions, the doctor asked some very personal questions. I now know everything about my mom's sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 144

You deserved it 6 792

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/05/2009 00:05 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor went through the normal questions, then paused for a moment and jotted something down. Later when I got back my report from the checkup, I noticed that the doctor had checked the "no" box by "sexually active." She didn't even ask me that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 439

You deserved it 6 459

By johnny121 - 01/01/2010 19:14 - France

Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 036

You deserved it 2 657

The longest monologue

By Anonymous - 29/11/2012 00:57 - Canada - Belleville

Today, I was waiting in a doctor's office when I was approached by an elderly woman. She told me all about the ripping of her stitches in a very private place, in exhaustive detail. Of course, today was the day my doctor chose to be an hour late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 121

You deserved it 1 715

By blehhh - 04/04/2009 03:10 - United States

Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 233

You deserved it 4 577

By jons - 17/02/2009 21:54 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for my yearly checkup. After getting my blood-pressure taken, my finger pricked, etc, the doctor began to ask me some questions. When asked if I was sexually active, I responded "Yes". The doctor started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 506

You deserved it 3 600

By Anonymous - 29/01/2015 19:18 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I found out that the guy I've been sleeping with is my mom's gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 424

You deserved it 4 727

Stop talking, stop talking now

By Anonymous - 14/06/2012 15:49 - United States

Today, I went out of town with my mother-in-law. I don't know what posessed her to start questioning me about her son's and my sex life. When I told her I wasn't talking about that, she began to dicuss her and my father-in-law's bedroom habits. The car ride was two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 115

You deserved it 2 660

By N/A - 25/09/2012 04:13 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 465

You deserved it 2 838

Revelation time

By Anonymous - 21/11/2009 12:56 - Finland

Today, I found out that my mom had read my diary because she was worried. She now knows details about my depression, details about my sex life, such as how I lost my virginity, to whom (I don't have a boyfriend), and what condition I was in at the time (drunk as a duck). She also showed my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 370

You deserved it 22 056

By Anonymous - 31/03/2009 14:46 - United States

Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me "have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "you mean with other people?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 352

You deserved it 71 725

plaguer 26

Wednesday 22 May 2013 9:04

She was probably just as embarrassed.

yoimtrollin 24

Wednesday 22 May 2013 9:03

These are the kind of things that stay with you for the rest of your life. Sorry you had to hear that OP

Comments

Fedezzer 20

Wednesday 22 May 2013 22:33

Everything you wanted to know about your parents, but were afraid to ask.

dakatabg 31

Wednesday 22 May 2013 22:41

Are you both alike?

scr_sensei 14

Wednesday 22 May 2013 23:05

You are a good child.

amifaiyaz 12

Thursday 23 May 2013 5:07

Well, just try to scrub it from mind op, nothing else to be done.

whatwhyhoo 10

Thursday 23 May 2013 6:08

OP was surprised?

kiswani_anas 4

Thursday 23 May 2013 13:50

So how is it??

glamery 3

Friday 24 May 2013 4:54

or your mother could learn to speak english in the country that has english as the primary language. theres an idea.

Keliskay 1

Friday 24 May 2013 6:38

minus mine u currently have 69 comments..69...geddit? haha, poor u

Crammed 10

Friday 24 May 2013 12:19

Oh that's tough!! At least you know what to get her for Christmas.. A pocket translator!!

SwaffDaddy96 5

Saturday 25 May 2013 3:40

Talking about scarred for life.

Keywords

Video games Annoying Gamers Money Birthday Kids Cute Love Health Weird Awkward Relatable Abuse Social Media Scams Parents School Education Teenagers Anger issues Family Relationship advice Miscellaneous Capitalism Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I'd left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 308

You deserved it 3 970

Today, despite the fact that I'm happy and in love, my spiteful brat of a 12 year-old keeps spreading hateful and disgusting lies about my boyfriend doing unspeakable things while I'm away on business. Her dad told me he's reporting my boyfriend to the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162

You deserved it 604

The Top

Today, my son sprayed the bottom of my car and windows white with fake snow in Christmas cheer. He did a great job, except he used white spray paint instead of the fake snow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 558

You deserved it 2 449

Today, my husband asked if we could try food play during sex. I okayed it, thinking it would be the standard squirty cream or chocolate sauce. Let’s just say I was not expecting him to be eating crispy bacon and blue cheese sauce off my boobs. Good Lord, I married a weirdo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 188

You deserved it 526

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 397

You deserved it 7 735

Today, I was fixing my makeup in the back room of the office when my boss walked in. He looked kind of annoyed so I jokingly said, "Don't you want your secretary to look good?" He said, "If I did, I wouldn't have hired you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 696

You deserved it 14 367

Today, as the only female manager, I had to talk to a worker about her hygiene. I asked if she had the means and a place to shower. She rolled her eyes and said of course she did, but found daily bathing unnecessary, and that a couple times a month does her just fine. The whole staff would disagree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 525

You deserved it 116

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 367

You deserved it 4 161

Same thing different taste

The longest monologue

Stop talking, stop talking now

Revelation time

Top comments

Comments