Intimacy: Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not...

By gringa_Peru - 18/04/2009 01:19 - Peru

Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170 176

You deserved it 9 854

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By nevergoingonabusagain - 30/05/2009 06:52 - Canada

Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 253

You deserved it 5 707

Three's a crowd

By Anonymous - 13/08/2014 11:33 - Australia - Rooty Hill

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 668

You deserved it 4 014

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 891

You deserved it 3 408

By Justme - 30/06/2016 18:20 - United States - Missoula

Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 118

You deserved it 1 480

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 07:49 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the bus when a good looking girl accidentally brushed her ass up against my shoulder as she walked past. This only made me realize that this has been the closest I've come to touching a girls ass in over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 529

You deserved it 6 244

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 881

You deserved it 3 719

By dickface - 28/03/2011 20:13 - Canada

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 772

You deserved it 30 041

By Anonymous - 22/09/2017 04:30

Today, I saw a creepy guy grab a woman's ass on the bus, so I caught his arm and put him in an arm lock, only for the woman to hit me in the head with her handbag. Turns out they were a married couple on their way home to have sex, and who couldn't resist a quick grope during the journey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 091

You deserved it 4 680

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 16:00

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 709

You deserved it 210

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 04:53 - United States

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 101

You deserved it 2 553

nodbor 11

Saturday 18 April 2009 9:19

even dicks need a place to rest.

Narsh 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 9:19

How could anyone possibly say that you deserved this? FYL indeed.

Comments

jimmyb00o5 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 17:54

#15- That's because the only thing women are good for is sex "Today, I saw a woman on a bus and became aroused. I rested my erection on her shoulder, thinking she would get the message. She ran away screaming. fml."

dantheman_fml 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 17:57

#51 I concur... (ur forgetting the making of food too) but yeah mostly sex

jimmyb00o5 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 18:16

#52-High five.

mylifesucks52 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 18:21

oh bull.. the only thing guys are good for is their sperm (and some arent horrible to look at and play with and cuddle with). besides that we can do whatever on our own!

Izzy322 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 0:26

Yea sure humans have the technology to freeze sperm and use it later so I guess yea women could live without men...but for how long??? Sperm slowly dies off while frozen, but we also have the technology to MAKE and CLONE eggs...so u could say women are useless based on ur argument...men could live eternally without women...but why would we wanna do that I love vaginas not dicks!

acid_fml 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 18:25

Cut it off!!

dantheman_fml 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 18:28

well mylifesucks 52 i have news for you... i dont know if u didnt know this but men won... yes theres a couple random 1s like oprah but for the most part ur the 1s that are only good for sex

jimmyb00o5 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 18:29

#54- Women should only speak when spoken to, so you're way out of line. But, in light of your comment, bend over and i would be happy to supply you with your fill of sperm just as soon as you're done with the dishes.